For all the times

All the times she didn't do it
Even though she wishes she did
You all thought her life was perfect
But behind her tears she hid

All the times she lay there broken
Lying restless in her bed
Thinking too many thoughts to sleep
With the gun under the pillow by her head

A razorblade on her dresser
Makes her want to cut some more
Wants to make her keep bleeding
Till she's lying dead on the floor

Thinking of how no one would listen
And just how nobody cared
To drown out the sound of her crying
The music in her headphones blared

Nothing to stop her crying
Nothing else to numb the pain
Leaving her hurting so much
She's about to go insane

And for the times she didn't do it
She'll give this one last go
She'll find something painless and easy
It was the death that wasn't slow