The Flashbacks...

I keep having these flashbacks...
The flashbacks of the past...
I was told with time they'd fade...
But yet they still seem to last...
I see me being held down...
Against my will...
And only because...
I refused to take a pill...
I keep screaming...
Telling them to just let me go...
Because they just don't understand,
How bad I want to let this life go...
But they tell me just to calm down..
Because the shot is what I need...
Because they don't want me...
To cut and watch myself bleed...
So here they come with the needle..
I feel the sting as it goes in...
And as I slowly stop fighting...
And close my eyes again...
I start to pray...
Asking god why...
He just couldn't take me...
And let me die...