Terror in the memory

by ellewen   Dec 4, 2006


I can feel the terror in your touch
you have hurt me more then enough
It is amazing
the things people do to feel lust
my wilting heart cries for you to stay away
you just rip me in half as you may
you should recognize the pain in my screams
as you catch a glance of my eyes
tears flooding my face
it is such a taste I cannot bare
but if only you had a heart to spare

Glaring at my reflection
and thinking back to that day
I wish that every breath I took
would feel like my own
I wish this mind were not marked with a memory
especially this one I face
I can still feel my heart shatter within me
to this day I avoid the place that has forsaken me

I listen to my footsteps
amazed that it matches
the rhythm of my heartbeat
a fast pace
but not nearly fast enough
for the speed of my rage

Who is this girl before me?
Her body like a cage
while I try to set myself free
along with the memory
that hasn't yet abandoned me
I wish it would
As I feel the blade
my world fades around me
as I am blinded by my tears

Dark as his heart was
his face is hard to come by
because at the time
I tried to forget all the pain
and I tried to hold it in
I tried to live
I tried to let go
and I tried to forget
what I hope is a regret
of a really sad man

So now as I run
I fall
I crawl with a pain
that I cannot face
a trace of hope fills about me
then crushed again by a harsh memory

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Latest Comments

  • 17 years ago

    by N J Thornton

    This was good. I could certainly feel your pain and terror ( I notice you like that word, it's used in both poems you asked me to read).
    My favourite two lines were the last of the first stanza and the last of the final stanza, to me those were very vivid and quite originally written.
    The overall flow was good for the most. What did hinder it slightly though was the fact some rhymed and some didn't. If you were to stick to a fixed way, either a rhyme scheme or free verse it would read more consistantly.
    This is quite a popular (some say overused/cliche) subject, therefore I did notice some of the old (overused) descriptions sneeking in there. It may be difficult with this subject, but all in all it would make the poem a stronger piece if there were more new and creative descriptions and ideas.
    For example instead of saying "you hurt me" or "I cry" think of something concrete to compare your hurt or tears to, like sandpaper on an open wound, or moist memories (as you seem to use the memory concept often in this write). Those are just ideas and suggestions, you don't have to take them, I'm just thinking aloud.
    Thanks for sharing anyway, I enjoyed the read.

  • 17 years ago

    by Brittany C

    I really liked this poem. it is very good and deep. keep up the good work. you are a great poet:) 5/5

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