Terrified

by ellewen   Dec 5, 2006


Tears streaming down her face
because she knows that she's a disgrace
All that she wanted was a taste of reality
sometimes the penalty of wishing
is receiving what you asked for
I suppose it doesn't matter what she wants anymore

Thinking of the memory
that has torn her in two
It's hard to think
all the damage she could do
when hurt

Laying on the dusty floor
she is terrified
Why should she be scared
when all she is running from is herself

As she sees the shadows
she turns and stares
but no ones there
A part of her was scared
but a part of her also knew
if she looked up
she might find you

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Latest Comments

  • 17 years ago

    by N J Thornton

    Oh dear me, that last line was a clever one, and a scary one too. This has similar ideas as the other one I read, memories and terror.
    The descriptions of the "dusty floor" and "shadows" were good because they gave a creepy feel to the poem, which I guess is what you were going for.
    Honestly, I think there are some flow issues with this one. It was mainly the first two stanzas that were off.
    For the first stanza I think it was the wordiness of it that made me stumble, so if you could shorten it or break that up in anyway it may sound better. With the second stanza it was just the last line, and for the opposite reason. Maybe that line would sound better "when she's hurt" or something like that. Again, just suggestions, it's up to you.
    Thanks for sharing, keep writing.

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