The Truth Of It All

I will come out of this fine . . .
the scars of tonight will be hidden under my sleeves
it's going to be OK

or will it?

Will . . . no, CAN I come out of this bathroom feeling fulfilled?
or will the scar tissue swallow me whole
sucking me back into my past,
back into the forbidden truth of why I gave the toilet my blood
a countless number of times?

I will come out of this fine. . .
it's going to be OK
for now
. . .