Racheal my sister

by Bethany   Jan 5, 2007


Thanks to my sister, i have a life to live, for her my life i would give, i love her more than she will ever know, I'm stuck to her by a sisterly bow, i hope one day she will be happy, i know I'm starting to sound sappy, so now I'll try to make her laugh, a baby cow is called a calf, Racheal my dear i must tell you the truth, i haven't lost my last baby tooth, to you this poem i have wrote, I'm glad you like your new coat, i have a problem as you may see, your the only one who can understand me, thanks Ray for being my friend, i have nothing else to say so thats the end.

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Latest Comments

  • 17 years ago

    by GoodMorning

    Mmyesh, I agree with mistressxsork; it needs some structure and the comment about a baby cow being called a calf doesn't really fit in.

    But other than that it's pretty well-written, I think.
    Very heartfelt, dear. And that's always a fantastic start for writing good poetry. =)

    Keep it up, you aren't half bad! ;)

  • 17 years ago

    by *[[ JoRdSkIiEz ]]*

    Hey that woz a wonderful poem..i think you did such a wopnderful job and im glad ur sis lykes it..it made me think about my sis n how much i love them both..

    keep up the good work 5/5

  • 17 years ago

    by mistressxsork

    A baby cow is called a calf

    ^^I didn't get why that was in the poem. It could also use some structure. Other than that.. it was very well written. The flow was good as was the depth. Nice work. 4.6/5

  • 17 years ago

    by Karl Wild GG23

    This poem made me laugh lol, It was filled with love yet not to serious excellent job 5/5

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