Nights Chill

Nights Chill

Humbled by this affliction, heart feeling the emptiness of being alone,

Insecurities haunt the person within cutting to the bone.

Timid as my hand grabs hold of this life offered once again,

Zealous the desire to find happiness in the end.

My hysteric actions provoked the anger alive in me today,

Awkwardly I stumbled falling into deception causing dismay.

Envious of those never knowing the grip of despair,

The breathlessness of depression crushing my pathetic heart without a care.

My weakness brought about this suffering of my soul,

Wavering strength preoccupied with the unseen battles, preoccupied no more.

Wrathful? No! Not once more. Contemptuous desires slowly fade from sight,

My stubbornness softens, warmth over coming the chill of the night.

I think of you often and the cost of my addiction,

How your pain and loss is what your left with in the end.

Knowing you never wanted to become in dignified,

But the more you needed from me the more I lied.

The indecisiveness of the way I lived my life,

Gave light to my dubious mouth, my tongue as a two-edge knife.

Leaving behind the beat less nauseated heart thats turned so cold,

Feeling so empty now stretched as far as I can go, aching for you to hold.

To feel you in my arms once more would not fill this emptiness,

There's no way these shaky limbs would calm with just one kiss.

So I'll not say to hold you once more is what this broken man needs,

Knowing your better now that your able to live, would begin to set me free.

I could be free of this immobilizing feeling,

If I knew you had moved on and started healing.

I want you in my life in more then just this distressed memory,

Will you look back and remember one good thing about me?