It\'s up to you...

I live a life of isolation
I don't like to get close, to touch things I know will eventually hurt me
I try to avoid them
I try to avoid the pain they bring upon me and many others
But sometimes it's hard
To deny yourself of what you really feel
Of what you really want
Sometimes, I risk it
I go in for a taste
And that one taste poisons me
Makes me realise what I have been missing out on for so long
Makes me realise that there is more to life
That life isn't about success but more about happiness.
Its about seeing beautiful things
Feelings beautiful feelings
Creating life changing relationships
Helping one an another get through this thing we call life
Once someone tastes these things
Even if it only be one
We are lured by our humanity
It can be seen as our weaknesses
Can derail us on our way to success
But, sometimes, in the end it's worth it.
Because being happy should be our priority in life.
I do not fear happiness, I fear it ending.
What do you do when it ends?
When those beautiful sights are demolished
When those beautiful feelings are gone
When the relationships die
When no ones there to help us, but ourself.
What are we supposed to do then?
When we have spent our life relying on happiness to make us happy
What happens when it all ends?
Everything ends one day
The question is
Do we define these changes as balance and see it necessary to be unhappy once in a while?
Or do we be negative and not want to feel pain and so build walls around us.
To protect us not from happiness, but from the pain which follows?
Life is odd, and there are so many paths we can take.
But it jus depends on you
How much do you want to live?
How much are you willing to sacrifice to feel those 2 seconds of happiness?
Or if you're lucky, you might find a lifetime of it
It's up to you

- just something i randomly wrote today... Theres a battle going on inside me -

anasha