Sparks of Chemistry

I hate feeling this way,
Not knowing what to do next.
So many thoughts blurred together,
Never getting a chance to rest.

I hate seeing you like this,
When I know I cannot have you.
But I control my jealousy,
And keep pushing myself through.

I hate depending on you,
Always looking forward to each day.
I'm not used to this one bit,
But I kind of want it to stay.

I feel myself smile more often,
Laughing for no reason at all.
Even with all these doubts in mind,
I know that I'm too strong to fall.

I know that I can do it,
I'm sure of myself this time.
We have the obvious chemistry,
And I'm ready to call you mine.