That was such a beautiful poem!

"With the face of an angel, pretty eyes that shine,it seems that I'll remain here forever, wishing you were mine."
That was such a good line! so sweeeet.
you must really like this girl. 5/5

Lol NOT bad for writers block , its verygood so far finish it and let me know :)) 5/5

"You know its true, that no matter what I do,
I'll wait for an eternity just to be with you."

This is exactly how I feel. Great poem.

I love the description, so many poems are lacking imagery. fantastic "illuminating goodbyes" some is really vivid, while a few are a bit cliche.

Great poem of a yearning young heart. I found it a very enjoyable read ,although in the second line

the moonlight [ begins]to die

Great write as I like Quality short poems5/5

Aww. i like this poem. very good job. =]
Few things--
blushed- i think it should be flushed. but thats just me. :P
No place left~,~ there should be a comma there, the flow is a lil off. =]
no feeling more painful than this feeling I have inside. this line seems too long. but just slightly, myy recommendation is to shorten this line slightly, or lengthen the one above it,
pretty ? pretty, please your talking 'bout an ANGEL. lol. cant you use a better word? glorious? magical? something? lol
remain here forever i think the 'here' should be removed from this line.
~~ and watch your capitalizations and punctuations. =]

~~
now dont think i didnt like it, or it was horrible or anything! =P you asked for a crtitiquing,. so i gave it. i pulled every line apart! lol. it was a great poem. i just said the little things that could help give it a lil push. lol

5/5!
(if it were out of ten id give it a 9)

Very romantic......I like it Bryan. It has a nice flow and rhyme pattern. Keep writing! Enjoy your work....

Debbie

Aww Byran, what a great poem! Man, even with writer's block you're still really good. I know what you are going through...I spend a lot of time wishing that people were mine... but there's a way to try and make that happen: ask them. lol Idk if that helps at all, but me personally, I'm sick of waiting around if there's something I could do to make my life a little better. Also, try being spontaneous, like if you really like this girl and you know that she's not dating anyone, go up and kiss her. You might think I'm crazy, but sometimes things like that work!
Anyway... after that useless part, I really enjoyed you poem and you'll have to let me know when you write more into it because I would like to read it. =]
5/5
Ciao

Very nicely written. The flow as well as the structure was great. Your wording was outstanding, keep up the great work.

Peace, Joe

Okay .. to be completely honest.. this poem is GREAT :D .. the emotion is spectacular.. some of the words are simple and the imagery is dry.. however... some words are wonderful and very descriptive..& the flow is nice.. super write!

"With the face of an angel, pretty eyes that shine,
it seems that I'll remain here forever, wishing you were mine."
___

^^ Loved those lines, Bryan. This was a very sweet poem. And something I can very much relate to. Beautiful write. Never stop!

-` Liz

So touching and good,especially those

No place left for my wounded heart to hide,
no feeling more painful than this feeling I have inside.

Keep up the good work
Laura

Writers block poems are never the best because we force them....
I'm 50/50 with this poem. It was sweet. I also liked some of the lovely words such as "illuminating," "Intoxicating," "captivating" they were very beautiful and original.
What I wasn't keep on was the predictable rhymes - come on you can do better!
Also can you think of a better word than "black" to describe the sky?
Plus, angel is a cliche image....naughty Bryan.
Lovely poem though...Keep writing.

Bryan
i was waiting so long for another poem by you. You did not disappoint. This is beautiful! Word choices excellent. the picture it leaves in my mind is such a lovely one. Keep up the wonderful poems. Take care your friend Cindy

I think this was a very sweet poem..and even with the writters block it turned out pretty nice...umm, there was one verse i didnt like "You know its true, that no matter what I do,
I'll wait for an eternity just to be with you."...i think there was just one too many words ryming with "you"..maybe i just didnt read it quite how you pictured..but it just seemed seperate from the rest of the verses. Other than that, very nice poem:):)

I thought this was such a great poem. the flow was magnificant and i loved every single part of it. Your descriptions painted such vivid pictures in my mind! great job! 5/5

If this is not your best then you're best must be amazing! i like how you used multi-sylabol words. It gave it a lot of flavor and even though i had to read it slow to get it all in, i thought is very VERY well written! keep up the great work!!!
~Amy~

It has, what the french call: i don't know what, great poem.

Bryan
I wanted to read one of your poems.
so I read this one again.

With the face of an angel, pretty eyes that shine,
it seems that I'll remain here forever, wishing you were mine.

beautiful!
Take Care Cindy

I loved it, it seems these are the words i wanted to express, but obviously you are a better poet than i am lol