Lost soul

I am but a simple shell of the person i could be
tormented fragments of a lost soul
scattered amongst the thrashing thoughts of an adorned past
filled with such sorrow
captivated by the anorexic heart
that beats flamboyantly in this very chest

who are you to say
i am but a pitiless
child
to say that a bitter heart has no remorse for actions she commits

criticize me again
love
my fragile heart can bare the pain

icy shards of redemption
trickle down these poignant walls
built so high
forever bound by these horrid scars
of a broken heart

will i ever be freed of these hideous burns
burns left so deep from the fire that once escaped
your crimson lips

menacing thoughts of ragged memories
trace my mind
reminding me of the decisions i have made
the choices
at the time
were pleasurable
but looking back at this wretched journey
i see not the temporary joys but
the pain endured to have them

why
did i allow you back into my life again and again
with the knowledge of your deceitful ways
why
did i allow myself to wither away to please you
i bowed down to your artificial superiority
why
above all things did i love you
and let you crumble my world apart

why
am i but a pitiless
child
a bitter heart that has no remorse for actions i have committed