Comments : Desire

  • 17 years ago

    by Independence Forever

    So...who's the lucky man who doesn't realize you're alive kaila? an awesome poem, i enjoyed it.

    your servant:
    david

  • 17 years ago

    by Melpomene

    I liked this poem alot it was nicely written. Loved it alot. Nice good job~Mel

  • 17 years ago

    by Mousie

    So pretty and touching.. really a good write, i loved the wording and the flow, wonderful job, i gave it a 5/5.

  • 17 years ago

    by firexdancer

    This is so sweet!!! i can relate exactly to this, and you did a gorgeous job of putting this feeling into words. it flowed so smoothly, and was so beautiful.... 5/5
    gabriella

  • 17 years ago

    by David

    Oh this is so sweet! its so magical and full of love. i really enjoyed reading this wonderful poem.

    5/5 always. david

  • 17 years ago

    by BrokenREALiTy

    I definitely love this poem . Like wow . I`m gonna keep going back to this poem, cuhs` I don`t know why, but it just really ... Wow . It could be because it brings me back to when I still believed in love .

    "Desperately craving,
    to see your face again,"

    I like that choice . 'Desperately craving .' I don`t see it used often, or at all for what I can remember, and it works (:

    "I'm bare without you near.
    I thirst to hold you again."

    Same goes to that .

    "Continuously thinking,
    about what your thinking too.
    It kills me deep inside,
    I can't tell you I love you."

    That stanza was the one that I fell in love with though . I could just totally relate to it , and it was so real . Beautifully written . Magical, sweets . I`m definitely checking in with you`r poetry more often now (:
    ..__MiNDYY

  • 17 years ago

    by Kristina

    Wow wonderful poem! i really enjoyed reading this. i think you did a great job on it! 5/5

    ~Kristina

  • 17 years ago

    by Anonymous Angel

    Hey,
    nice poem, the flow is great, as well as the rhyming, i love you choice of words =)
    good work 5/5
    kisses stephanie

  • 17 years ago

    by skynerraw

    Wow, this poem is amazing!

    "Continuously thinking,
    about what your thinking too.
    It kills me deep inside,
    I can't tell you I love you."

    I really enjoyed reading this! The flow was great, and full of emotion!
    Sky

  • 17 years ago

    by lexie

    Kaila i love this poem .
    luckily i know who its writen to.
    kaila you are very good at writing.

  • 17 years ago

    by Brook

    Thanks so much for the poem comments! i love the comments =]
    and i love your poem! this is really good. you can feel your emotions just flowing out of this, and i really hope you continue to write!
    <3

  • 17 years ago

    by Wings Of Flames

    You described desire perfectly.
    I enjoyed this poem. It rhymed and was a very free and natural.

    Keep up the good WorX

  • 17 years ago

    by N J Thornton

    This seemed like an average love poem to me; same overused subject base.
    On the second line it should be "your."
    I'm baffled though how you slipped up there but got it right in the rest of your poem lol.
    The rhyme in the second stanza seems awkward, and maybe forced. It seems as if you're saying "you don't know when I'm going through pain" and I'm sorry but that sounds odd.
    Hmm, it was sweet, but to be honest I'm not all that keen.

    p.s. Sorry if you thought I weren't going to repay your comments. As far as I'm aware this is the first time I've come online to return comments...So I'm unsure what the other comment was. I've been busy lately, but I promise to comment on six of yours...it just may take some time.

  • 17 years ago

    by omgitsmina

    I love the overall tone of frustration and hoplessness that flows throghout the entire piece. Very nice choice of rhyme pattern, it goes appropreatly with the short lines in the stanzas; sometimes the fewer words we use, the more we invite the mind to come to its own conclusion and use its own imagination. Very well written, if I do say so myself.

    <33

  • 17 years ago

    by Crystal Gaze

    Kaila, Magnificent (sp?) write.
    This poem was bursting with emotions, You can tell how much it means to you. The flow is excellent, the usage of words. Amazing!
    I loved it, great job.

    Elaine xox

  • 17 years ago

    by Vanessa

    I really liked this poem. The flow was awesome, and you put so much feeling into your word choice. An amazing write 5/5

  • 17 years ago

    by Brittany C

    Great poem. I completely understand where you are coming from. I'v been through the same thing but than again I dont think I have a chance to get with any one. Anyways keep up the great work. 5/5

  • 17 years ago

    by Startle Me

    I enjoyed this poem :].
    It was consistent
    The wording's okay
    It could be better.
    All in all.
    I give it a 5/5.
    Like I said.
    I enjoyed this poem.
    Not many poems can do that for me. :]

  • 17 years ago

    by Debbie

    I think it's a cute poem. There are some parts where I can correlate with this piece, whereas I can't to the other part. Such as waiting for this person to do a move--ah, yes! I have been thoroughly annoyed about that..
    Anyway, it's a good poem. It could be augmented in structure by showing more imagery, but like I said, it is fine the way it is now. Nice job.

  • 17 years ago

    by moonlil

    Very beautiful poem!