Wow, this poem was really good. I love the metaphores you used and the stanza that repeated throughout the whole poem. The rythm was up-beat, which is kinda sarcastic in this type of poem. Best poem I've read in a while. Way to go. 5/5

Wow.. i was definitally not expecting this poem, based on the title. idk what to say. that was soooo good. i really hope this wasnt a true story. and if it is im really sorry for your loss. i like how you repeated the first stanza, every other stanza. it defintally made the poems flow great. and the rhyming was impecable. idk what else to say. great job and keep it up. :]

Wow I didn't expect the poem to be about that, I agree that repeating the stanza was very good, almost like a chorus to a song. The rhythm kept on going and was very strong, well done 5/5

Didnt expect it to be about that, thought it'd be like a childs story thing or something lol. Anyways I loved how you repeated the stanza, it was an excellent repetition, great use of words. Well done 5/5

Wow. it's almost like lyrics and it's realy touching and it shows how bad those drugs really are...and how younger people do it more and more. :)
excellent.

I like how you described the feeling of drugs with fairies, dragons and little green men.
good work.
the 2nd line it turned out perfect.
5.5

The 2nd stanza of the 2nd line made me worry but in the end it turned out perfect.*

I feel this poem is designed to expose the ugly face of self-harm, perhaps to jar the fantasy junkies back toward reality. I am impressed with your style

Great poem. I really liked. I think the it is just fine the way it is. Keep up the great work. 5/5

Absolutely amazing poem. I, too, didnt expect the poem to be about drugs from the title...but the title is a great fit for the poem despite that. And I love how the first stanza repeats throughout. The rythym and rhyme are flawless. You have a lot of talent! Keep it up! 5/5

"Crying for him, needle stuck in his arm"
"Screaming its another method of harm"
"he fell from his chair, I knew he was dead"
"He was only thirteen, too young to die"

Perfect form, 6/5 if i could.

I really liked this poem, I think a lot of people can relate to it somewhat. Instead of magic poison, I think potion would go better with it, because the hallucinatios and such. good job, loved it.

Really good, reads like a song and it'd probably be easy to put music to it. 'chorus' repeated a lot and I'd of liked to see more verse but it was still a really good poem. 5/5

Ah the stanza that repeated thru out this poem really made this poem stronger and more purposeful.

i like it. i like how you had a messgae in this poem too. don't do drugs or needles or you will die. that life is precess. he was too young to die.

5/5 David

This was really interesting. good job. keep it up

Rhis was very well done you showed the reader a clear message and you did it well the only thing was you never really wrapped up the whole poem in a final decision to yourself or the reader but a great write I must say good job Plot121.

Alot of raw emotion, nicely put to paper...tocuhing

Had to read it twice, but I enjoyed it. I'm not sure about the repetition-- it does tie the poem together fairly well, but it also kind of distracts the reader. (Maybe that was just me.) Either way, this was an interesting and unique read.

Another great read with a good use of repetition.

Dragons, fairies, little green men
That was awesome let's do it again
Feel the needle under the skin
Releasing it's magic poison within

I will admit that thats my favorite part. It just seems to say so much. Keep up the good work. *5/5*

Alyson

Hm.
That first stanza is captivating. The other stanzas I didn't like as much... I think you should use that stanza in a new poem, the same story, but try not to be cliche, and let me feel how you felt when you cried for him.

Sorry I seem like I'm telling you you're horrible; you're not, but you said to be honest. =]

xTheEcstasyofSuicidex 5.5