The girl stood alone

by Vanessa   May 6, 2007


The world is against her, crushing her dreams
Held in a reality where nothing is what it seems
Evening comes, the dark is her favorite place

Grateful for night, tears roll down her face
Inside she cries for innocence lost
Raped as a child, a hell of a cost
Living alone with this great a pain

Slits on her wrist, only prove she is sane
Tormented, everyday for most of her life
Often she dreams of ending her life
Only pretending in her sick twisted mind
Daddy would leave her suspended in time

Alone and scared, to afraid to tell
Living in her own private hell
On her knees she starts to pray
Not really knowing what to say
Ending her life, is not the way

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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by xTheEcstasyOfSuicidex

    Hm. Still cliche here, but I can understand you write for you feelings and not for me.
    However, as in the other poems, I really didn't feel anything from you, yet I did. It's hard to explain. I'm not sure why, but I don't much like it. Sorry. And, again, punctuation. I'll say that everytime.=/

    xTheEcstasyofSuicidex 4.5

  • 16 years ago

    by BECCA lessTHANthree

    Very good visuals in this poem..

    i liked these lines a lot
    "The world is against her, crushing her dreams"

    "Inside she cries for innocence lost" i like how it sounds.. rather than lost innocence

    "suspended in time"

    however this line "Living in her own private hell" needs one more syllable to flow.. but besides that the flow was perfect.. also i dont understand the strucutre it goes from a 3 lined stanza to 4 then 5 and then 5 again rather than 6

  • 16 years ago

    by Idiosyncratic

    I have to stay that the first stanza was absolutely excellent, but it started to go slightly downhill from there. It lost some of its basic imagery. Even still, it was a fairly good poem. Not as good as the others, but still above average.

  • 16 years ago

    by Brittany C

    Great poem, full of emotions. It also has a great flow. Loved it:) 5/5

  • 16 years ago

    by Sweet lig

    "to be stand alone.. it doenst mean ur all alone",,, this is only the way that u have to move on and be strong.. well very powerful dedication coz its totally express ur truly words.

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