Addicted

I tell myself I'm happy,
But inside I know I'm not,
I try to hide these feelings,
With alcohol and pot,

So I take a couple shots,
And I get dizzy and impaired,
My feelings get all crazy,
I get so lonely and scared,

Then I take a few hits,
And I get up on cloud nine,
Everything turns good,
And everything seems fine,

For hours they help me,
And take away the pain,
But when the high is over,
I only feel the same,

I don't understand it,
Don't think I ever will,
I need these things to help me,
But all they do is kill.