It's a beautiful 1..very good write..powerful...well described
"cruel laughter, a madman departs
a young protege, wisdom imparts"
beautiful lines...great visual imagery is filled in the poem...Good wrk!
Kp writing!
xxPoojaxx

OMG that was so...so....omg i cant even put into words how much i love this poem! i have to add it to my favorites!

Nice one mate, a real good read, loved the transition between the darkness and the happier times. Really worked, in a kinda morbid, depressing, suicidal kinda way.
5/5 from me.
oh, and good to see another poem from you, not seen one for ages.
-Black night-

Cool poem. I liked how you set it up. 5/5

Excellent flow to this write. Reality mixed with the memories from the past. A truly believable write.

Powerful Write!!
Great Job.
Good flow and it rhymed also
This was really sad but great work.
5/5!

I liked how you went from happy to dark.
Flow was flawless throughout the entire poem, the imagery used created vivid pictures and the word choice is enjoyable.
The only thing I can suggest is to try and eliminate some of the fillers.
Apart from that, I love this.

Amazing imagery, the whole life flashes before the final thoughts. Excellent work.

Woah..
this is really creative
I thought this poem had alot of originallity
I think that you are a very talented writer David
keep it up!!
This poem was fantastic!
10/5 if I could
but i guess a 5 will have to do
love always
Your servent
kaila

"darkness, death, the waiting, all bad
a horrible dream, but the best i ever had"

Oh , I love it . Abso-freaking-lutely love it . It portrays both the good and the bad in life . And the ending was just perfect .
..__MiNDYY

Very good use of words. and ryming scheme was also nice. flow of owrds was so good. take care

Excellent. Really enjoyed reading a mans perspective on this subject. Its something that has never fazed me, but i can understand how it would other people. Remember the only certain thing in life is death. Keep writing mate. Im new at this so hope this does not cause any offence. Jade

"a gun shot, the silence breaks
pictures of friends, birthday cakes"

^ Oh wow. That was purely wonderful. The emotions were strong & powerful. & the imagery was so vivid - I could picture everything in my mind. You really are a talented writer, keep it up! =] 5.5

Stephanie Lynn .+.

Wow David that was really gppd i loved the flow in it. good job
Kate~

Wow that was amazing... you have a way with words, and everything in this poem flowed so nicely... the imagery in that poem was excellent... 5/5 from me, and thanks so much for the comment, i really appreciate it!

This is an awesome poem.
You've got talent.
Keep going.
Jadee.
:)

Ive been reading your poems and For some reason, i just connect to them, your really good

Very stong
i lvoe it
5/5

Wow this is an awesome as poem
i could visualise the poem in my mind (Y)
its great powerful words.
=D
5/5

xo.louiiii

Wow, this was so touching...... i really love the way you came up with this idea, it was so unique. a 5/5 from me as u really deserve it. keep it up