Knife to my wrist

I put the knife to my skin
I look in the mirror and close my eyes
I dig the knife into my wrist
I cut open and sigh
As I open my eyes I look down
I see the blood draining from my wrist
I want to see more
So I clinch my fist
More pours out
I wonder if this is it
As I get lightheaded
I think oh shit
I know this could be it
I fall to the floor
I lay there shaking
I cant remember any more
I wake up look down
See the cut and start to cry
I look at myself
And start asking why
I want to know why I do this to myself
I want to stop but it feels so right
So I just lie there holding my wrist
Until finally I fall asleep for one more night