No one can say they know me, I wont let them in till I know myself.
See now I will wonder if I will ever get it right, sometimes it all feels so wrong.
How can it be that I was so deeply unhappy but so outwardly content?
I do not know the person I was anymore, she is a stranger to me now.
But still I will run from my thoughts, some of them are too complicated to understand, maybe I have done that on purpose, will I ever no for sure anyway because I will deny my feelings, what good have they done me in the past?
The thing is I was born with fear in my bones, I have run miles and miles but it has not helped me, I have given up on running, wish I could give up what I was running from.
I have got a different side to me, a part of me I just wont show and if you see it, it is a slip up on my part, for that I apologise, no one need know, its not that its anything to be ashamed of, I have just spent too long being the strong one, its hard for me to be anything else, I am trying it for size, though ever so slowly, bear with me whilst I uncover it all.
Here is the thing you see, I am strong but I will break, I am solid but I will crack and crumble, see me smile, I can curl up so vulnerable.
I have found that I am a 1000 contradictions inside myself, I kinda like it that way.
To everyone I am mostly loud and wild but you hit the right chords, catch me off guard, I am someone you wont recognise and that scares me just a little because what if you do not like it?
Where will that leave me because I can not stop what I have started, I have been breaking down all that has covered me, no point in leaving it half done, I am transforming in front of you but will you like me when I am done?
This is my first poem on here, i hope you like it, please comment if you can, your opinions would be appreciated, thankyou :)
