Thoughts and actions

Thoughts of suicide are
running free through my mind
theres nothing i can do about it
so i actually use a toy to
demonstrate it for me
i decide i don't like it
so i do something
i told myself I'd never do again
cutting it brought back
some old feelings that
i haven't felt for a while
and this time
i don't care who sees them
because at least i will be happy
thats all you people want
so I'm giving it to you