He died

by sheila   Jul 27, 2007


My best friend died
On a saturday night
He went to a concert
And never came back
I got a phone call at 9 o clock
His mom said he wasnt alive
I was in shock and begin to cry
I couldnt believe
My best friend had died
He died of alcohol posioning
My best friend died
On a saturday night =[

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  • 16 years ago

    by Woe

    I like the repeating of the first and last two lines... your poems are so short though.. 5/5 its great.. you have alot of different stories in all of your poems, theyre not all about the same thing.. i like that. you should work on longer ones though.. they really get the point out alot better. hope i dont sound harsh.. im really not.. =) keep writing.. youve got something.

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