Don't do it

by sheila   Jul 27, 2007


I'm writting this poem
To let you know
I don't want you to go
You said you couldnt handle like anymore
All you feel is pain
Your brothers play a game
Where they hit you til they make you cry
And the one who makes you cry wins
Yous parents hate you and wich you died
You alwayz get your heart broken
And your best friend is dead
But i bag and plead
Don't do it don't go
Your gonna be sorry afterwards
Even though if you life is no fairy tale
Don't do it don't go
I love you and need you
So don't do it don't go

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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by Mary

    Hey sheila!! i think this poem deserves a 3 :( but if you edit the poem and fixit up a litle i woudl reate it a 5.. i think that a poem shoudl either rhyme or not rhyme.. in this poem i htink you made it to rhyme but if you wna tit to rhyme you have to have a pattern liek A and A rhyme and B and B rhyme like

    A
    B
    A
    B

    see what i mean in this poem you did liek

    A
    B
    A
    B
    B
    A
    B
    A
    B
    A
    A
    A
    ........

    i cant relly explain what i mean lol but i hope u get it <3

  • 16 years ago

    by Mary

    Hey sheila!! i think this poem deserves a 3 :( but if you edit the poem and fixit up a litle i woudl reate it a 5.. i think that a poem shoudl either rhyme or not rhyme.. in this poem i htink you made it to rhyme but if you wna tit to rhyme you have to have a pattern liek A and A rhyme and B and B rhyme like

    A
    B
    A
    B

    see what i mean in this poem you did liek

    A
    B
    A
    B
    B
    A
    B
    A
    B
    A
    A
    A
    ........

    i cant relly explain what i mean lol but i hope u get it <3

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