Words Can't Describe Me

I am indescribable
I wear a mask
I act tough
I am frail
I seem weak
My guards impenetrable
I am surrounded
Yet I am alone
I wish to stand out
Yet I still blend
I am not satisfactory.
I am not "hot"
nor am I pretty,
They don't like my hair
nor its color
I am not wanted.
I have A body
But not THE body
I smile
but it is hollow,
merely a thing to pass the time,
but not a thing that holds any meaning
I am not desirable.
I SEEM at ease
I am insecure
I act tough
mostly as a cover
for my being insecure
I am shy
I am bold
I am not suitable.
I am safe
but scared
I have no reason to fear
but still I am paranoid
I love to play
but I am not good at the game
I am selfish
and yet still selfless
I am bossy
but subdued
I am a leader
stuck following
I am wise
yet young
I am a patient person
but I have anger issues
I am not satisfactory