Blank Paper

I sit hear and stare
At the blank piece of paper
That I will eventually will fill
With all my pathetic feelings
And my love for someone
Who doesn't really love me.

Its sad to think
That I can't tell you how I feel
But yet I can tell a piece of paper
Is this how its supposed to be?
Me keeping everything to myself
And sharing it with a paper?

I fake a smile when I see you
Because I know if I told you
How I really felt about you,
You would frown and say "sorry"
But sorry doesn't fix anything
It doesn't make anything better

My friends all say
That he isn't worth it
He isn't worth all my suffering
All of my pain,
But if I didn't have him,
What would my life be worth?

He's the only one I've ever loved
Yet he's the only one
That has ever hurt me
So much that I stay up at night
Crying, hating myself, and
Talking to a piece of paper

I feel that if I just had one person
One person who feels like I do,
I might be able to talk
Talk to someone..
Someone who can relate to what
I am going through

My heart pours out
On this blank piece of paper
And no one will ever know
How much you hurt me inside
Besides this piece of paper...
Maybe its better that way.

Sometimes I just sit and cry
Cry and cry over and over again
For something I never had
But yet wanted so much
Something I was so close to
But yet so far away from

I think its better that
I tell the paper my feelings
Because people don't need
To be brought down by what I have to say
They would all think that I was
Pathetic and deserved what I got

Most of the time I just
Want someone to listen
And my friends aren't to great
At doing that anymore
But when I talk to the paper,
It just sits there and takes it

I sit here and stare
At the now filled piece of paper
Sitting in front of me,
Feeling angry that
My feelings mean more to paper
Than they do to you...