My Beautiful Struggle

Sometimes I hope to die.
So this war within, will secede.
I'm tired of all the worry and the lies,
Open my lungs and begin to breathe

But they're shallow breaths.
I'm overtaken by fear,
Not much left
I've been fighting for too many years.

My soul is in shreds
Mauled by hours of contemplation.
Disagreement between my heart and head
Leads to torture by indecision.

I'm getting tired, start to sway
Close my eyes and call to thee
I look forward to that brighter day
When my reflection is actually me.

Sometimes I hope to die.
So the pain will leave
But this beautiful struggle is life
And nobody said it would be easy