Fat

Kind of a poem :s

Why do I feel this way? Tell me what I have done to deserve this!
Why is it me who has to live with this, this thing you call my body?
Why do I feel so worthless when I look at others? When I see some gorgeous girl, it kills me, cause I know Ill never look like that.
Its not like I don't try, Ive tried everything. I would give my life to look like these people, to know what its like to be loved.
And people wonder why I don't believe in God, if there was such a thing how could he give me this pathetic excuse for a body?
Why would he put me through it?
Do you know what its like to self loathe? To look in the mirror and all you see are the imperfections, things to be changed.
You poke and you prod, hoping, wishing, that some day you'll wake up and be happy, cause you have a body worth having.
This face, one only a mother could love.You tell yourself it wont be forever, you convince yourself you'll finally do it.
And you walk up the stairs, you try, but you cant do it. Its the only thing that would change it, but your too scared.
She done it, why cant I?
So I make a promise to myself, some day Ill have the guts to go through with it, I wont think about the consequences, just the finishing image.
AND ILL WALK UP THOSE STAIRS, AND ILL GO TO DO IT, AND I WONT BE SCARED...ILL BE HAPPY!