Lament of a Friend

I kicked the dirt aside,
Walking down the grass that glowed in the sun
Knitted with blossoms and petals of the wind
Forming a path to my worst memory;
A path to show me your end.

The air seemed so fresh that day
Filling my lungs, then out again
Replacing my numbness with a fire
That I had not felt for almost a year;
Almost a year since I saw you in person.

Your face no longer lurks in my head;
Your words no more do echo in my mind;
But it is your habits and actions
That still replay in my memory
And I watch them alone in bitterness.

I still dont know what fate means
And when I think of you there is no answer;
No solution as to what happened
And your downfall is still a mere mystery;
Eating at my head; etching my memories.

Was fate what caused your downfall?
Or was fate to show me it was my fault;
That I let you drown my pains
And so the current drowned you,
With my heart suffering in the process.

The path was a shade of black that day,
Whereas before I used to see gGrey
But white light still did shine
On the sea of rocks in my path;
Amongst them a rock Id come to see.

I stood before it,
Bold dark letters etched in the stone;
Reading your engraved name
Made me want to run;
Made me wish I would die too.

The flowers were then laid down
And I remember when I first knew;
The day I was first told
That Id from now on be without something,
And that forever hed be missing.

I kicked the dirt aside,
Knowing there was nothing I could do
How was I supposed to suppress
Everything I ever felt for you?
I never was whole again.

The water must have been so dark for you
And my life that day
Must have been a wild shade of grey;
Before I lost you to the flowing current
As you drowned in the water element.