Just when

I think it's safe to let my guard down
I am comfortable with my sleeves up
I think that another can love me.
I am open with another
I don't want to be numb
I don't ever want to be with another one
It seems normal to eat
The panic attacks don't seem so bad
this is when
reality sets in
more so like the obvious
no one could ever love the unlovable
I loved and was pushed aside
true feelings of love were nothing but a pathetic joke on me
sleeves back down
fading in and out
the words I spoke were true. from my heart
truly in love, I was thrown away
confusion, screaming, hurting, aching, hating
but
too you, I am no more
my love is real. so very real
I can't fight anymore
My words are true
BUT JUST NOT TO YOU

stand up, smile, listen to other's
HELL NO
I AM SO SAD, YOU MUST BE GLAD