I missed you more than a retard misses the point!

There's no such thing as "good mourning".

You said you were mine but you were really someone else's.

You were late but I never missed you.

A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle.

My step dad is where brain cells go when they die.

I bet you'd say you love me if you had a few more drinks.

Either I'll eat you or I'll eat your soul.

I am not here right now so leave a message and it will be deleted once it is recieved.

If you're a real man, you'll try and hit me instead of him.