Earth is a prison, Hell is Death Row, but Heaven is freedom.

Alcoholism is when a lawyer spends 20,000 UgX on booze that costs about 2,000 per bottle and then begs for 1,000 as transport to take him home.

Prank or wrong number calls from strangers are a chance to make new friends.

When you hide your feelings of attraction towards someone, you are labelled a coward. When you express them without fear, you are accused of sexual harassment.

Texts are sexier than voice calls.

When there is a ditch in the middle of the road, you use the sidewalk.

Sickness is like death calling your name.

Even designer bags get torn and worn out.

Money is just a number.

Females always want to be equal to men, but one thing they can never do is produce sperms, just like males cannot give birth to babies no matter how much LGBT advocates spread their mindbending theories.