It hurts to want everything and nothing at the same time

And when i die do not bary me with a downward fist.....
but with an upward bloody wrist....
not to make the gods mad....
just to show them all the pain i had....

I cant find my self to leave my bed...
but yet i never dream....

Never pay the reaper with love only

I realized soething today
I am beautiful
i am a beautiful
letdown
I am a beautiful
Mistake
I am a beautiful
Disaster
I am Beautifuly
Me!!!

I pay the reaper every night with drops of blood praying everytime that it will be enough for him.