Raspberry Tongue (1-for-2)

Hey! It's been forever since I've written something, but I wrote a new poem called Raspberry Tongue. I'd appreciate some feedback on it.

It's right here: http://www.poems-and-quotes.com/sad/poems.php?id=1149591

1. Please leave honest thoughts.
2. I leave in depth comments, so if you would like that on your pieces, I would appreciate if you could do the same for me.
3. LEAVE TITLES, PLEASE!

Thanks!
'Briana :)

Excellent job please do "Angels Face" and whatever else catches your eye please and thankyou.

^ Done! Thanks! :)

Still open.

I am about to!
Please do "A Journey Through Hope"
and whatever else one you'd like to do(:

^ Thank youuu! Haven't seen you in a while! Done.

Still opennn. :)

I just added a new piece, called Waves of Exaltation.

If you do both of them, I'll do 4 of yours. Again, please leave titles! :)

Still going. Lalalaaaa. :)

Please do my latest while I catch my breath

great poem!

Thank you, Michael. I will return the favor shortly. :)

Anyone elseee?

Sorry for the delay, Michael. I have commented two of your poems.

:)

Done! Please read:

'Lost'

and

'Fear's Comeuppance' or 'Deceptions of Fate' whichever you feel motivated to comment on.

:)

Thanks.

Loved the reads :) Any that catches your attention!

Woo, thanks girls! :)

I'll get to them all ASAP!

EDIT:
Brittney -- done. :)

Chinds -- done. :)

Britt -- done. (:

Ok and which ever ones you want please and thank you

I just want my latest. Please and thank you.

Pausing this so I can catch up. No more until I'm caught up, please.

Thanks! :)