Masterpoet Tournament: Heat 2

Wizards, wenches, warthogs. There was drama, there was tension, there were injuries and tears and sweaty grimaces...but Heat 1 is over. Three challengers have stepped proudly off the platform with their bright red ribbons of participation. Ten challengers remain, trembling wearily in anticipation of Heat 2.

A fresh page has been laid before you.

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Here is the THEME of Heat 2: Write me a ROMANTIC LOVE poem. Oh yes. A poem that conveys love for another. It can be desire, loss, secret, new...all that. Make it lovely. See if you can avoid the gaping pit of cliche.

And here are some tempting little apples you might want to pick to boost you in your mission- they will be added to the judges' accumulated score (but beware, they may be poison for you):

BONUS POINTS (worth one point each, valid only once each per poem, you may use as many as you want):
* Your poem contains a three-line stanza with 7,5,7 syllable count
* Your poem is a Bob Shank. It doesn't contain "I". No line ends with a particle or preposition.
* Your poem contains the words "my big bottom"
* Your poem contains this rhyme scheme: abab, bcbc, cdcd, ee

And beware these hairy spiders of doom (but you might want face them for the sake of your poem):

PENALTIES (deduction of one point each)
* Your poem contains the word "love"
* Your poem was the last one submitted

MEMBER'S CHOICE AWARD (worth two points)
In this heat, there will be an opportunity for ALL of you reading this, participants or not, to contribute to the judging (this does not include the three judges). Please pick your top three poems of this heat, number them 3-1, 3 being the best, and PM them to me ONLY in the two days following the submission of all 10 poems. The poem with the most votes from the audience will score an extra two points. Any comments from you may also be quoted, anonymously if you wish.

To qualify, submit your love poem to me BY MONDAY NIGHT (18 Oct), specifying the number of bonus points you were after, if any. Enjoy writing, my lovely fools.

Hahaha. I like interesting.

However, this may be new and confusing. If any of you have questions, please ask them here so everyone can confirm things.

Yep, you can't use the same bonus point multiple times. Each is worth a maximum of 1.

Obviously you can't vote on your own poem in MEMBER'S CHOICE AWARD (worth two points)

Actually, I wanted to see how many people DID vote on their own poems. Then I would oust them. Haha. But, yes, in that case, I would only take their other two votes and award 3 and 2 points to those.

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Some poets have already started working hard.
First submission:

My Big Bottom it has
a mind of it's own
it wiggles and jiggles
for it is not toned.

I can't get my jeans on
they are too tight
the zipper won't budge
try as I might.

No squeezing or pulling
will get my buns in
they must have shrunk
for I was never that thin.

So, now that I know
I have not put weight on
I'll have me some tea
with some jam on a scone.

Unfortunately, this poem does not qualify as the poet is not one of the 10 remaining challengers. Nor is the poem exactly about romantic love. Nevertheless, it is a truly admirable poem and I wish this poet all the best in their future aspirations as a writer and in finding jeans that fit.

Ha ha ha ha.

Great challenge once again, dear Abby!

Okaaaaaay..this IS good.. indeeed.. ABBY why r u so funny !lol

ABBY!!!!!!

I adore you.

Okay that was funny! :] ugh... though about writing a romantic poem :P I hate love poems but I will have to change my opinion for this one :]

Maybe so, Britt :]

I think love is the most challenging topic. Our judges know it too. That's why I picked it. You can do it.

I would not like contest poems to be posted, even the eliminated ones, till after the whole contest is over. Also, please try not to state whether you have won or whether you have been eliminated while these heats are on. This is also to make it as fair as possible. All poets to all poems will be revealed after the Maaaaasterpoet has been declared.

PS. I'm loving this too.
PPS. I have spicy lentil and bean soup with toasted cheese for lunch. Be jealous.
PPPS. Now get back to work. I want to see your poems.

Keep the mystery alive! DO it! Keep it secret, keep it safe!

This has been a word from our sponsors.

I promised Kevin something, so here it is: sorry for being so harsh on you. I didn't mean to hurt your feelings!

Aw :)

Ha... Sibs aka Smeagol.

I couldn't resist writing the poem I just wrote for Heat 2. I know I'll get some head shakes, but hey, it had to be done. My heart told me so!

<3

Ingrid I love your maturity :)

BRIIT..NO ur not the only one...I chersihhhhhhh
love poems...can't wait to submit mine even if am eliminated..this is too much fun actually XD

Abby : Yes sir..Achoo! ;) :P

"can't wait to submit mine even if am eliminated..this is too much fun actually XD"

I couldn't agree more.

Fun fun fun fun fun. I ammm on a sugar-high, that could be part of it.

Lmaoo hahaha and oh u DAMN DAMN DAMN...ur last poem is a hurricane in the world of poetry..can't find a stronger expression..oh yes unless i say a TSUNAMI

> and ya well i love love poetry..who doesn't lol

Lol, Nana, I am working hard on mine too:)

You are my biggest victim when it comes to harhsness, yet we are still deeply in love aren't we? LOL!!!!!!!

I believe in Kevin, just like I believe in you <3

LoL, ingrid, you were right to say what you did...the first time. The second post was uncalled for, given I'd admitted my foolishness.

However, we're golden, and now I think you are kinda hot, cause I like ladies who tell me to shut up and calm down.

Hence why I'm e-stalking Abby, Jane and Sibby...

Yes, you are right, I was wrong.

I am glad we are golden and thanks for the compliment. Ususally I am just called arogant :p

Make a stunner poem, hun:)

Well, I wrote a new poem last night, but it's not for an competition.

I'm out of the running now, it would be rude and unfair to ask to be put back in.

Don't be silly, you can come back, I am sure of it..right, Abby?

Lol
Ingrid ahaha ya i think we just share a bit too much ;) :P and from a veryyyyy long while<3 u rock :P

and KEVIN ...am Glad..

Seeing as how another member was brought back into the contest after Kev withdrew and I assume Abby is trying to keep a specific number of people so the contest goes smoothly... I don't see Kev being allowed back in. Not up to me though.
Couple more weeks and a new site contest will be up!

Aw:( what a bummer! I wasn't aware of that fact.

Then you must join in again next time, Kevin!

Yes Nana, me loves you muchooooooooooo <3

I knoooooooowwwwww...I love ur guts toooooo..haha..(lets hope no body takes us wrng :P) tho

and ya i think she is right..was replaced :(

Let me just say... even you are eliminated, it does not mean you are out of the game just yet. Which defies the whole meaning of elimination.

Wait till Heat 3.

I've been receiving a few poems already. Very disappointed to note that none of them have gone for all four bonus points. Surely it can't be that hard to place "my big bottom" somehow in a romantic poem?

Are the scores cumulative?

I'd be more than happy to write a second poem! Pretty sure I can fit all bonus points in.

Its hard to write from the heart then try it shape it this way and that...

Mascara shaped tears
Creased her cheek
As
My big fat bottom
Ached for forgiveness

..... :P

Haha...I was semi-joking. The bonus points are there as temptations, not encouragement. I would still be impressed if someone could do it effectively though.

Yes, the scores are added like last time. I will be awarding bonus points after the judges' scores.

Hahahahahahahahahahahaha.

Ha.

Lol ya i was thinking about that too..how !

You'll be subtracting bonus points too, yes Abby?

Huh? How do you subtract bonus points? They are only for adding, if you use them in your poem.

The points I'll be subtracting are the ones under PENALTIES. They apply to all poems. Just like the bonuses, there is a maximum of one point deduction per penalty (even if you use the word "love" in your poem numerous times, you'll only lose one point).

PENALTIES (deduction of one point each)
* Your poem contains the word "love"
* Your poem was the last one submitted

Oh. Right. Penalties, my bad, not bonus points. How dare I use the wrong words!? ;)

Only one point even if used numerous times? Huh. Wish I had known that *before* I submitted my poem, WAHAHA!

LOL haha Jane..i think u can pm her changes..since she didnt post them yet..donu XD

No, it's ok :) I'll leave it as is.

Thanks for looking out for me though.

Always XD

Is everyone finished with their poems yet? : )