Round 1 results/ Summer Contest round 2

Hey all contestants! With it being summer and it being busy, I only got ONE judge per round with brief comments and scores out of ten...remember, you ALL got 5 bonus points for guessing your person correctly.

#1 Cumberland Camp at Night

This was a very difficult prompt to craft a poem for, but I do admire the tasteful crafting of this piece. It was cute, and funny, along with a very nice display of nature tones. My only drawback really was the word "guts" being used, just feel maybe a rather unique approach to guts may be a bit more exciting for this poem. Very nice!

score: 6 +5 bonus = 11

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#2 Where the Dusk meets the Dawn

HOLY MOLY CAMPERS!!!!!!
This poem took my breath away! Love the elegance and word usage for this prompt. Its absolutely BEAUTIFUL.. The flow and etching of this piece, sent chills down my spine. Very creative and well written! Really enjoyed and admire this piece!

score: 10 + 5 bonus = 15

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#3 Superior Advice

A romantic camping evening gone soar by nosy, annoying campers! Love this! It's cute, simplistic style left me smiling. Really enjoyed!

score: 7 + 5 bonus = 12

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#4 Timid

Again I'm speechless!! This poem highlights word usage at its finest, along with descriptive visual displays! Love the way this was written!!!!!!!

score: 9 + 5 bonus = 14
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#5 32

I love the timeline effect with this poem... its drawn in intensity which I do like. It seemed to drag a bit for my tastes, but all in all a really fun piece!

score: 6 + 5 bonus = 11

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#6 Clanging At 2am

This was cute, fun and to the point! I love the comparison to the scientist line... really a sweet and well written piece!!

score: 7 + 5 bonus = 12

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#7 Untitled

Again, this was a difficult prompt, but I must say, again a humorous poem, which I really enjoyed. I feel it was kind of rough in spots, and with a little attention to detail, this could be a very fun and crafty piece!!

score: 5 + 5 bonus = 10

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#8 Untitled

My mouth dropped on this poem... Love the play on tongue twister feeling I got while reading this piece. Very nicely created with the prompt given!

score: 9 + 5 bonus = 14

** ROUND 2**

I have to say, my favorite thing about camping when I was younger, were the activities the campground provided. My favorite one was a scavenger hunt. We went around to all the different campsites and had to ask for random things...So fun.

Round 2 consists of a scavenger hunt.

Find 3 poems that have the word Summer, Sleep, and Water in their title. Obviously not all in one title, 1 of each....search for ONE line in each poem that you will be using in your poem.

Your poem must be about a search/quest/looking for something lost, etc

Please PM me with your title of poems and who its by and which line you used :)

Due by Sunday the 21st!

Can we scavenger hunt within our own titles/poems? Or does it have to be from different authors?

Were 3 eliminated from this round?

Errr we cant use lines from other peoples poems without their permission....

^^ that's what popped to my mind.

This is a no elimination contest, winner is by most points :) 2 people did not enter first round. Theres only 8 of you total.

and youll have to ask permission :) Ive already trial ran this to see who has poems with those words in their title and a ton of active people do,so a quick PM should be no problem.

I for one, have 2 of three words as titles and anyone can use mine :)

also, these poems are just for a contest they dont have to be posted to your account if the author doesnt want it to be.

THIS IS TOO MUCH WORK.

Okay, fine.

No one said itd be easy..... :)

Just wanted to say that I have received messages and I can't reply to them now so will answer here: anyone is welcome to use lines from my poetry.

This will sound silly but what do you mean by a line?

a line like a sentence?

or like a line as a line in a poem...

let's say they have this "poem":

Now I dream
as my step mother says: No,
no, no, don't sleep,
pretty please just breathe.

and I use the line "now I dream"

do we still need to ask for permission even if the words are cliche ones or just 3 -5?

and also do you want the whole sentence or just one line?

Depending on the length of the borrowed line and the novelty of the idea included, this would fit under the Fair Use doctrine. Only if you were to post it to your site it would have to reference each source independently.

Additionally, since it incorporates the borrowed line into your own original work, it becomes a derivative work, another exception to the copyright restriction; again depending on the amount of the work borrowed and compared to the percentage of original work with it. Again, when posted to your site it must still be properly referenced.

Luce, 'now i dream' would be considered a line :)

I think there should be extra points the longer line you quote.

It makes it more of a challenge to find that piece of the puzzle that would fit into the poem one is writing. :)

^ challenged! BOW...

I believe I am going to add that in there :)

5 points extra if all three lines are 10 words or more
3 points if theyre 8 words or less
2 points for 5 and less.

^^ all three lines.

Thanks Mr. Larry

and that's a challenge.

So excited to see what everyone comes up with! (Given round one entries were all amazing, and Chels wont let me enter late so I need to write vivaciously through the entrants, lmao)

And Larry, I may be one of few but I do love your legal related posts, sometimes they make me wish to go back to my law studies ;)

Seriously-good luck to all contestants!

Oh nice, way to throw me under the bus jen.

I cant help that youre a slow ass and cant make deadlines hahaha

Whoooaaaa just got the first poem in, its awesssommeeeee

P.s....sleeping/ or watering/watery is acceptable in titles as well.

What about rinse/ rain/ downpour/ flush/ commode/?

That's cheating! :P

Only 1 in? Yikes. OKAY OKAY I'll finally get to work lol.

Larry....just....no. hahahah

Down the drain

I'm not sure if I'll be able to get an entry on time because my internet is down (the only way I can get internet is by going up to my grandma's and I'm not staying long). Sorry! :(

Hopefully it'll come back soon!

I believe this is failing miserable, however the 3 poems I do have in are amazing!!

I can allow a few days more time if needed?

Please

Yessir :) I'll give everyone til Tuesday :)

I don't think I'm going to get my replies in time :(

I wanna see the pooems.

I'm curious too

#1 Running Away From Our Dreams

The homeless children have come to expect me
prowling the alleys in run down city streets;
Wherever I look, though, you are not there; yet
I'll never forget your smile, your laugh or your hair
and the way you walked out on your life and family.

It seems now that your happiness depended on more
than I was able to continue giving: my depression;
I needed you to pick up pieces of my broken mind
and you were happy nursing me back to sanity
but you didn't accept me when I wasn't feeling blue.

You were a faithful Nightingale singing my way home
until I arrived in tears and smiles with newfound hope
yearning to begin again and out the door to perform
but your lightness of mind is now filled with doubt
that you will be a part of this new life you midwived.

The homeless children know your name, your smile,
your laugh and even your hair, they do not know
where you are but they tell me they will find you
and we will look into the rumors of your presence
however difficult they are or far afield they take me.

Your Summer by 0BrokenBella0
http://www.poems-and-quotes.com/sad/poems.php?id=994848
"I'll never forget your smile, your laugh or your hair."

Deeper Water by MorbidCupcake
http://www.poems-and-quotes.com/sad/poems.php?id=814786
"But you didnt accept me when I wasnt feeling blue"

Let Destiny Sleep by Suicidal Love
http://www.poems-and-quotes.com/dark/poems.php?id=1031964
"But your lightness of mind is now filled with doubt"
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#2 The Quest of The Night

I met a girl who once told me:

"I had a dream last night,
the ocean was the most beautiful
I've ever seen."

I could not believe her,
for the ocean could not look more beautiful
than it already is
not even in her dreams
or so I thought

but last night, I too had a dream.
Waters swayed to and fro to a moonlit shore,
Mountains sung a siberian song
as glacial peaks enjoyed the aurora borealis
reflected in the arctic floors

then I woke up

I woke up to the sounds
of track-gears departing just as the sun.

but I was too far behind
that I could only whisper under the cold near the mountain top
"please, don't leave me in the middle of
a hash winter never to see the sun again"

"Please, don't leave me
stranded in the crisp of this frigid weather"

but no one heard my voice,

only that girl- just her -
the one who I met a long ago and who
"[spoke] in riddles of a past when light
was afraid of the dark"

and so, I started my scavenger hunt,
I started searching for that girl
while the sun was nowhere in my sight.

--

Until I found her,
I found out what I never sought to have found.
I found out that that girl was I,
she was the night
the one whom the sun was afraid of,
but also the one who made the ocean
look more beautiful
than it already was.

Title: Go Back To Sleep

"I had a dream last night,
the ocean was the most beautiful
I've ever seen"

By: Yaki

http://www.poems-and-quotes.com/sad/poems.php?id=1206033

Title: The Lost Creak Of Summer (Collab With Lebanese Phoenix)

"Don't leave me
in the middle of
a harsh winter
never to see the sun again"

By: Tara Kay and Lebanese Phoenix

http://www.poems-and-quotes.com/sad/poems.php?id=1183968

Title: The Water Fountain

" Speaking in riddles of a past when
light was afraid of the dark"

By: Maple Tree

http://www.poems-and-quotes.com/life/poems.php?id=1216646
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#3 Requiem

Little trinkets and hopeless treasures are dusted around
my ankles, as I carefully breathe the air that slips down
my throat like a liquid too intoxicating to refuse.

I am not here to find just anything, for I am solely in need
of traces of her. The scent here is pungent, reminiscent
of leaking oil, unwashed mouths, and loveless paper.
I do not wish to rewrite history only to salvage her once
again in memory.

Ignoring the train engine that's rattling the neighborhood,
I allow her song to pull my heart back in the right place,
where my eyes do not gaze upon a junkyard despised
by all, but upon a collection of every part of the earth
she touched with her genuine smile.

That autumn evening when she went missing, signs
were posted on every highway and sirens never grew quiet.
That's when I knew no matter how hard we tried,
we could not go against nature. It was her time to leave
as much as I hated it, like when that sun reluctantly faded-
Light was afraid of the dark.

I am on a new quest now, for the child who visits a rainy
graveyard believing he will detect upturned soil hopes for
an impossibility; I will grow in her spirit still hovering
above me, her my constant guardian.

And she will call out my name in a vibrant voice,
reminding me I did not lose her or my fragile soul-
Like the tree of life you will never die.

1) "I'll sleep when I'm dead (acrostic)"
by: Chelsey
line used: "Ignoring the train engine that's
rattling the neighborhood"

2) "The Water Fountain"
by: Maple Tree
line used: "light was afraid of the dark."

3) "Sonnet to Summer"
by: Michael D Nalley
line used: "Like the tree of life you will
never die."
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# 4 Seeking

There's a canary on the sill.

He's perched, watching
the leaves sway, but knows
he can't make them move.
A moth tucked into a rosebud
flits her legs together, but she
can't make music.

They're all looking for
something, perhaps a rebirth,
like travelers in the bellies
of our mothers, who crave
that rolling motion -

constantly searching.

Lines used:

"A moth tucked into" - Summer [Chain of Haikus] by Noura

"There's a canary on the sill." - Sleeping With the Enemy by Sibyllene.

"in the bellies of our mothers, who" - Water Creatures by Sibyllene.

Thanks for posting Chels and these are beautiful! That first one is incredibly touching...but I love reading through all of these, reading the twists and seeing what is being searched for.

Are there going to be more from the other four poets or are these all because of the deadline being today?

Thanks for posting

1 person quit, 3 didnt make the deadline.....another example of pnq's slow death lmao

Slackers :P

I like how different the poems are.

Excellent stuff here.

Chels, you're jaded.

***RESULTS!!!!***

1 Running Away From Our Dreams

***

Good use of the three lines in this piece, I like how they seemed to slot in seamlessly to the whole feel of your writing. Good emotion throughout that hits real sadness at times, but there is an under current of optimism bristling just under the sadness. Some of the imagery conjured is very expertly written. (My only qualms are the spelling mistakes, 'new-found, mid-wived?! And rumours)
8 out of 10

#2 The Quest of The Night

I like this, very dreamlike and mysterious. I also think that the last stanza could be axed and it wouldn't be missed. (I was actually surprised to read it, I thought it ended well on 'while the sun...')
There is some capitalization missing in stanza three, three instances so I am deducting 3 points from 10)
score 7 out of 10

#3 Requiem

**Stanza 5 is very touching and very sad, this piece is very well crafted with some good detail scattered amongst some heart rendering prose. I think that using the last line as you did was very clever and a great pick. However on the negative side it is also the best line in the whole thing, which from a point awarding point of view loses points.

Score 6 out 10

# 4 Seeking

**

Okay, where I am from in outer mongolia 'travellers' has two 'L's'
that aside I thought this was short and sweet, The imagery in line 1 is excellent and you give real character to the canary and moth, there is also a tinge of sadness throughout. I commend you for using three lines that fit seamlessly into a small poem.

Score 8 out of 10
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ROUND 3 To be posted when I'm off work lovelies :)...great job everyone!!

Awesome, thanks! And congrats poets.... always interesting to read comments and see reasons for voting so.