Weekly Contest Results June 30th

  • Meena Krish
    3 years ago

    Good Morning Everyone,
    I hope you are all well and staying safe. First, I want to thank our judges for
    their time and effort to make this weekly contest possible. Congratulations to the
    front page Winners- Gracy Judith, Anthony Krieman and Daniel and those who
    received Hm's. Well done everyone and here are the comments from the judges:

    WINNERS://

    Mute Moon by Gracy Judith (21 points)

    Plans Change by Anthony Krieman (10 points)

    Stem by Daniel (10 points)

    COMMENTS://

    Mute Moon by Gracy Judith (10 points)

    “The imagery of this poem was simply breath-taking. I love how the
    poem started with a moon that’s cut loose, which then ‘plunges’ into reality
    (‘this verse’). It very much reminds me of the moon as a crescent-shaped boat,
    as its anchor is cut loose. Not sure if it was intended, but I thought that this
    particular word-choice was very effective. Gracy elegantly paints a certain
    suspense with her diction: this “luring sphere” that’s quiet, yet wholly acknowledged
    by the persona. This poem perfectly paints emotions through imagery, although
    the meaning of it all seems a bit ambiguous… but I think that just adds
    to its enchantment.”

    ````````````````````````````````````
    Mute Moon by Gracy Judith (7 points)

    Another one of those very talented new members, Gracy has my 7 points this
    week with an image-filled little write about her wish for the moon to fall and
    light her verse with silver shine. However, her "only companion" will not abandon
    the sky and remains a fixed lure to this poet and her pen.
    If I had a small gripe with this it would be the use of "luring sphere of gleam" –
    the word "gleam" just doesn't sound quite right to me there, but it is personal
    choice and it doesn't detract from this lovely early post from Gracy.

    ```````````````````````````````````
    Mute Moon by Grace Judith (4 points)

    This poem, though a quick read, was very poignant and well-written. The poet
    personifies the poem in acknowledging that this is a poem - "I want to / cut loose
    the moon / watch it plunge / into this verse". This works as a really strong
    opening and great imagery of the moon hanging by a thread or hook being sent
    plummeting to earth.

    "My only companion / suspended / in the wide expanse / of grey" - The first two
    lines are so beautifully structured, the loneliness of "my only companion" being
    its own line, followed by just the word "suspended" - the word describing how it,
    itself has been placed in the poem.
    -------------------------------------------------

    Plans Change by Anthony Krieman (10 points)

    I have to say, this week has seen the site's joining with two or three outstanding
    new members and Anthony is one of them. Sometimes, poets come along who
    seem to just fit in very naturally and you struggle to imagine what the place was
    like without them.
    Anyway, in honesty, this was a selfish choice to some degree because - without
    giving away too much - I read my own life's story here, with one or two variations.
    We do not always end up doing exactly as we would have wished, but we often
    look back and see that perhaps the path our life did take us on wasn't that different
    after all. Fate is a funny thing indeed.
    I loved this and as cliched as it may be, I related entirely. Well done and a really
    warm welcome to the site, Anthony.
    ---------------------------------------------

    Stem by Daniel (10 points)

    This poem's utilization of imagery presents us with an extremely evocative piece.
    The descriptions of a snake - both bloated and full, and of one slender and hungry
    - paint a vivid scene for the reader to imagine.

    "its rib cage yawning / open around a globular / mass of meat" - If anyone has seen,
    in person or in photos, a snake eating, they can picture this very easily. The idea of a
    rib cage yawning - it's just a mind-blowing description. Well done here.

    With snakes being able to consume creatures/prey far larger than themselves, it
    is a wonder at times how their bodies are able to digest their enormous meals
    without splitting open. Daniel does a fantastic job describing this, as well as the
    slithery nature of a starved snake - slender, limp. There's so much wonderful imagery
    and the pacing itself snakes along at a gliding pace, much like the poem's subject
    does over ground.

    There are also many metaphors that can be drawn from this poem - some
    religious, hearkening back to the biblical story of creation, or a metaphor for
    class structure in society, a painting of the "haves" vs. the "have nots". It certainly
    makes you think when reading it. Excellent piece!

    HM’s://

    An Untreated Case by nourayasmine (7 points)

    I wrote her goodbye by Ben Pickard (4 points)

    The Harbour at the End of the World by Shoreditchpoet Dennis (4 points)

    In 13 by Rania Maollem (7 points)

    COMMENTS//:

    In 13 by Rania Moallem (7 points)

    “Merely three lines, and it’s haunted my memory. That, to me, is a sign of an
    excellent poem. Whilst the title is a bit unclear, I am assuming this has a
    special symbolism attached to the writer. The poem itself was very articulate
    and effective. The first line (embracing one’s soul, the deepest part of ourselves)
    is intriguingly intimate. It made the next two lines punch even harder: the
    stone-cold ‘ditching’, ‘bonelessness’ and an ‘empty pier’. The simple yet clever
    combination of this all makes my stomach turn; it’s both brutal and beautiful.”
    -----------------------------------
    I wrote her goodbye by Ben Pickard (4 points)

    “The first stanza felt achingly relatable… How all of us, as writers, conjure images
    that become real as our similes and metaphors breathe life into them. The words
    become a part of our veins, our body, and at one point we cannot contain them within
    us anymore: our words will affect others. I get a sense of protection from the first few
    lines; how the author might have tried to prevent this woman from drowning into
    his words… but what’s done has been done. She’s a part of him, because she was a
    part of his words. And as it all flowed into creation, it easily evaporated into musical
    smoke… another art form; an eternal yet fleeting muse.

    Although I am not sure if my interpretation is correct, I did enjoy the journey
    that Ben took us on with his poem. From abstract metaphors to the tangible
    smoke and aching lungs… The journey goes through high hopes and a sad goodbye,
    but it’s this sense of loss that makes it so impactful. I almost wish to take the
    smoke back, inhale it back in my lungs, just to keep the memory alive for a
    little longer.”
    ------------------------------------------------

    The Harbour at the End of the World by Shoreditchpoet Dennis (4 points)

    A wonderfully accomplished poem, from its subtle rhyme and imagery, to its
    Vibrancy and genuine feelings. A joy to read from start to finish and other very fine write
    from a new member. Excellent stuff indeed.
    -----------------------------------------------------
    An Untreated Case by Nourayasmine (7 points)

    The first line - like a letter - opened this poem very nicely. The poem reads very
    much like a letter in its pacing and structure, also, which lends itself well to this
    chosen style of introduction.

    "When you ask me / about the nightmares / I make up less terrorizing ones." –
    This is a powerful sentiment; trying to avoid re-visiting the darkness of our
    thoughts/experiences by dampening their effects with imagined scenarios - still
    terrifying, but less so than the actual events/thoughts.

    "I did the math, and knew I was broken." - You can feel the pain of this line,
    the hurt of feeling incomplete or shattered.

    I thought the strong part of the piece was the string of different acronyms for
    PTSD - this showed a strong creative approach to a difficult condition to deal with.
    The ending as well hits you extremely hard when reading it, the poet's feeling that
    they no longer exist.
    Overall this poem was very strong and definitely deserving of nomination!

  • Ben Pickard
    3 years ago

    Well done to all highlighted and a genuine thanks to the judges for their time and in depth comments.

  • Poet on the Piano
    3 years ago

    Fantastic to see some new poets! Congrats to all. Thank you to the judges and to Meena.

  • D.
    3 years ago

    Thank you Meena, thank you to the judge for the wonderful comment, and thank you Noura for providing the awesome contest that inspired my poem! There were many great, varied poems nominated as always this week. Absolutely awesome to see two new poets on the front page.

    Hope you all have/are having a great week. :)

  • Larry Chamberlin replied to Meena Krish
    3 years ago

    Thanks, Judges & Meena for posting.

    Congrats to Gracy, Anthony & Daniel. It's especially nice to see a new member "grace" the front page.
    Congrats also to the honorably mentioned.

  • Gracy Judith
    3 years ago, updated 3 years ago

    Thank you so very much Judges & Meena. I'm humbled and honoured at winning. I truly appreciate your time taken in reading and reviewing my poem. Grateful for your indepth feedback. I'd also like to thank Larry, Ben, Poet on the piano, and Daniel for their kind comments here.

    Congratulations to all the winners & HMs. Such bubbling creativity on this site. I love the community. It has been such a pleasure being part of it. Thank you all for making me feel welcome here.

    Much love
    Gracy