Women asking to be raped?

I was having an msn conversation and the person I was talking to had an opinion that deeply disturbed me. He said that he hated it when women wore skimpy outfits then cried when they got raped. He said if they dressed that way they had to expect something and they were asking for it. I couldn't believe it. I asked how he could think that way and he said it wasn't all the guys fault that girls shouldnt dress that way if they didnt want anything. This conversation made me burst into tears and wonder how some people could think the way they do. What disturbed me more was other people share his opinion. How can anyone condone rape? Saying the chick is asking for it if she dresses sexy? I can't believe anyone could have that frame of mind to this subject. Your thoughts?

I think he might be refering to Prostitution.

Just because a girl dresses sexy doesn't mean they are looking for anything.

People today are sick, Just remember that. The world is not like it use to be. Yes Rape happened then too, but not as often as you hear about it today.

Just Remember one thing, you are who you are, and the way you dress has nothing to do with it.

Peace, Joe

"He said that he hated it when women wore skimpy outfits then cried when they got raped. He said if they dressed that way they had to expect something and they were asking for it"

I agree with him to an exent. There are some girls that wear practically nothing, flirt excessively with older guys, hang around dodgy ares a night then ry when they get raped. I feel tha is asking for it, to an EXTENT.

"I think he might be refering to Prostitution"

No he was referring to exactly what the original poster said.

Were you even listening to him? He wasn't "condoning" rape. If you dress like a slut, you're going to be treated like a slut. Pure and simple as that. It doesn't justify the rape. Nobody said that. But if you don't want to get raped, COVER UP. It's like if I told you that if you don't want to die in a car crash, wear a seat belt - and you say that telling you to wear seat belts is "condoning car crashes".

he said is the girl dresses sexy its her fault. Thats condoning rape. I dont condon dressing like a slut either but where to you draw the line? "her skirt was too short" "her top was too tight" so guys cant help themselves? its like saying when a guy gets turned on by what your wearing hes allowed to w/e he wants to you? When a girl says no its means no. Doesnt matter what shes wearing.

What? I didn't say rape was okay. But if you're advertising your sexuality, don't be suprised if men treat you like an object. Am I saying that's okay? NO! It's just easier for you to twist my words to make me into a barbarian than it is to rebut. Animalistic logic? That's a new one, what's that mean? :D

well said bob

By dressing like a slut it is somewhat her fault. Obviously the main fault is the rapist's, but advertising your sexuality is playing with fire. If I don't want to get mugged, I don't hang around in dark alleys. If I don't want to get stolen from, I don't leave my valuables in plain sight in my car. If I don't want to get raped, I don't dress like a slut. It's pretty simple.

we get treated like objects when were completley covered!

Unfortunately yes, a lot men do treat women like objects even when completely covered. We don't all do that though, to say otherwise is blatant sexism against men. But looking around, how many women are "completely covered" ;)

so a girl goes out for a night on the town, dresses up and its her fault she gets raped? Thats just not write. A must control his impulses. If he gets arrested for rape and tells the jury "she was dressing sexy so she was asking for it" they will laugh in your face and send your ass to prison.

Now that gets into a whole different topic. Why do women feel the need to show skin and be sexy? Why do we feel its OUR job to be attractive and to attract men? Turn on your televison set!

Jesus Christ, actually read what I am saying, eh? If a girl goes out for a night on the town and advertises her sexuality, she shouldn't be too suprised when she gets raped. If I don't wear a seat belt in a car, I shouldn't be too suprised if I'm severely injured in a car crash. THAT DOES NOT JUSTIFY ME GETTING INJURED. I still don't deserve to be injured! BUT IT HAPPENS. Get it into your thick skull. It's still the man's fault. It's still not justified. It's still evil. It's still wrong. But it was also stupid of the girl.

when we get dressed up to go to a club we shouldnt be thinking "Will this want men to rape me?" Thats BS.

I told u in my first post....more people think this way the you think......

Why not? Rape is a problem for girls. You can't use "I want to be ignorant" as an excuse. When I go out for a spin in my car, I shouldn't be thinking "Will I possibly be injured if I don't wear a seatbelt" That's BS. But I can't hide from the fact that not wearing one is stupid, no matter how much I might hate to wear one. Sorry, that's how the world works. It's not a very nice place.

It's an analogy, Einstein, to explain a point.

Rape is a problem for girls.

^^ Rape is not just a problem with Girls, it is very well the same for guys, you just don't hear half of those cases, because the Guy doesn't want anyone know that he was weak and got raped.

Besides this...Rape is something that can happen to anyone regardless of age, sex, and even looks.

~Joe~

No one deserves to be raped.

Alisdair I think I am the only person who gets your point. No one is condoning rape, just for the record.

Rape is unwilling.

How would they aim for such a thing if the whole concept isn't wanted?

First, let's make one thing very clear. If you say that a woman, man, or child is asking to raped, beat, or killed just because of what he or she was wearing, where he or she was walking, or who he or she associates with, what you are saying is that you condone the act. It doesn't matter how much you try to rationalize or justify yourself, you are saying that you condone the act just by saying that you believe the victim was asking for it.

Second, as Bob said, once the victim says no, it means no. Anything after that is rape.

Third, also as Bob said, rapists of any type deserve a bullet. But in my opinion, they deserve much worse.

Fourth, if I find out that anyone has raped a friend of mine, you better pray that the cops get you first. Because if they don't, they won't find enough of you to convict me.

Ho to that Timothy and Bob.... where the f*** are your heads Alisdar and William? You're both absolutely off the planet! And as for you agreeing with them Kim, shame on you!
I have a very close friend who was raped recently, and oh would I like a get hold of him... but the police are dealing with him... hah!
If you describe a woman who has the guts to dress how she pleases as a slut or whore, man you've gotta problem, A HUGE PROBLEM, with how you view your fellow humans... get a life! God, people like you make me so angry with your ignorance!

"Ho to that Timothy and Bob.... where the f*** are your heads Alisdar and William? You're both absolutely off the planet! And as for you agreeing with them Kim, shame on you!"

I didn't sai I agreed with Alisdair, I said I saw his point, and to an EXTENT feel they had some sort of rightness in what they were saying. I was talking about extreme cases, girls in practically nothing, hanging around dodgy places/dodgy guys at night can't say they did nothing to provoke it. I didn't say that they dresseing sexyily makes you asking to get raped.

Actually Kim by seeing the point you're missing the point big time... lets say you are a jew (I don't know) but if I said 'oh yes I can see where Hitler was coming from - can't condone killing though'... Is it beginning to seep in yet?
I am free to be whoever I want, no one has the right to force me into something just because of clothes I may be wearing... I find your lack of brain power insulting, maybe I'll pass on your thoughts to my mate, I'm sure she'd welcome a little extra ignorance in her life... after all some of her 'friends' are saying she brought it upon herself...
May you sleep at night, peacefully, for the rest of your life...

I think you're missing what im trying to say, which I guess is understandable as I am only writing it in a forum and don't really have time to explain myself properly. So im going to leave it. Im out.

Women who dress sexy are indeed asking for attention, they want to be noticed. They aren't neccessarily (spl?) looking for sex, but they are trying to attract potential mates. They feel that they might meet their dream person any day and want to look their best for it. That does not mean they want to be raped no, but the dude was right in a way because women do tend to be raped when they are looking so good. Many women still take the chance, the only way to stop it is make the punishment for rape so great that men won't try it.

".Unless you have been raped, or know someone who has...or a family member close to you...then you have NO right to say anything at all............"

Yes actually I know of several people who have been raped. Including my mother. Several times.

Needless to say Kim, but were any of the women you know asking for it? I doubt it very much. I still don't get it, where you're coming from I mean!

love and light anyways, I have no hard feelings toward you, more sadness that you have been suckered in by the popular myth, funnily enough originated by men, that if a woman...etc, but hey, that's the depth of our conditioning.
I'd be happy if rapist's were castrated, might stop some men from this crime if they were going lose everything.
I agree with Bob from earlier, if any of my daughters or female relatives were raped, the guy wouldn't be dealing with anything less than death, no police, that's how strongly I feel about this particular disspicable infringement of another's freedom to walk wherever, whenever, wearing whatever. Free your mind.

"Needless to say Kim, but were any of the women you know asking for it?"

One of the girls kind of was yeah, she plays guys, and agrees to meet up with them knowing exactly what they are capable of and what they have done in the past. This guy forced himself upon her in a pub. And she was annoyed about it. then she invited him around her house alone knowing what he wanted.. I know this isn't everyone, but i was mostly referring to her in my posts.
I don't want to argue about this anymore so .. yeah.

i would have to agree with alasdair on this topic. men look to the way women dress and by the way they dress is the way they most likely want to be treated. Me for instance, i like to wear layers of black, always my underclothing then a t shirt and short then my pants and another shirt then my hoodie, now if a man looked at me he would say hoodlum and if a rapist looks at me he would say "it would take to long leave her be" it mostly al depends on a way a female dresses.
when a girl wears a short ass skirt and a tight ass shirt then shes saying something. I've seen it, a girl can wear those kinds of clothes, get a boyfriend in one night, let them fuck her and then forget about the guy. its a bit of a cycle here, i have a friend who dresses like that and she agrees that she probably does look like a slut although i dont say anything. i'm too nice of a person to say shit. but anyways its all on the clothing!!
Girls if ya dont wanna get raped of your picture taken so a guy can look at it and masturbate, then dont wear skimpy clothes. ITS THAT SIMPLE! so dont go and put all the blame on the guy, blame part of yourselves if ya get raped for having been so fucking stupid as to wear skimpy as clothes. Its no ones fault if the guy can tear your undies off and just stick it in because you skirts to short. it gives a guy easier access the shorter the skirt.

Sure a woman may not be asking to be raped but she must always blame herself a little. usually the male is an ex looking for revenge for giving him so much damned sex and then dumps him or its a homocidal maniac looking for a chic with a short skirt so he can fuck her faster. its simple to figure that out. now dont bitch me out for putting my comments.

I don't really understand the post above me. It's like saying how would murderers aim to kill even though killings are 'unwilling'.

^^
I mean the girl is unwilling, how would they ask for it?

Again, people, I'm not saying rape is okay or that the girl DESERVES to be raped. Again you're not reading what I'm saying, just going "OMG YOU'RE SAYING RAPE IS OKAY RAPE IS NOT OKAY OMG" When the phrase "asking for it" is used, it's not saying that you want it. Let me go back to the seatbelt analogy yet again. If I'm not wearing a seatbelt, I am "asking" to be injured. That's not to say that I want to be injured - but if I wanted to prevent it, wearing the seatbelt would be a good decision. If I leave my valuables in plain sight in my car, I'm just asking to have somebody break into my car and steal them, even though I don't want that to happen. If I really wanted to protect them, I'd hide them. That's how the world works. It would be nice if I didn't have to hide them. But I can't pretend like people wouldn't steal them, because that's ignorance. Hide your "valuables", girls, and cover up.

I am glad my post if getting so much discussion and i am going to say what i said earlier in the thread. When women are getting dressed up to go out they shouldnt be thinking "Will this outfit want men to rape me?" Its ubserd. Men CAN control themselves no matter how skimpy the girl is dresses and if THEY choose not to its THEIR fault. Plain and simple.

Yes, it's not fair that they have to. But they must if they don't want to get raped. It's not fair that I have to worry about wearing a seatbelt. But I still have to if I don't want to get injured. It's how the world works, it's not a fair place. You can try and live as if the world matches your ideals, but you're not going to live for long. I prefer realism myself.