Comments : A Clock Stopped

  • 8 years ago

    by Jad

    This was a very unique poem with a different style about it. The way in which you wrote those showed creativity. I liked the idea in which you wrote this as I have not seen this done before like this.

    "Two sides of a love, one false, one is true
    Three hearts captured, one belonging to me"

    My favorite lines in your poem as it gave off great emotions of love and hope . The way you have written this made the flow go very well and also your crafty word choice. Good job and keep writing.

  • 8 years ago

    by Italian Stallion

    Wow Jane, I'm speechless this poem is so well penned, there is nothing to critique about it at all. Keep up the marvelous work!!!

    - Joe

  • 8 years ago

    by Courageous Dreamer

    "Two sides of a love, one false, one is true"
    ^I don't believe you need the is, it is better without.

    A very unique & interesting poem Jane! I loved the idea of the numbers and how each resembled something different and then the idea of the clock also tied in very nicely. I thought you did a great job, well done.

  • 8 years ago

    by Rania Moallem

    Jane..I think you have blown me away.
    This is one of the most mosr unique and creative poems I have read not over here but through my whole life.

    for many reasons this poem had a strong impact over me, and It reminds me of the old fine pure poetry.

    those written by gr8 masters, cause you had this cloudhy touch over ur which ur lines leave questions yet a smile.

    If this poem doesnt win the weekly contest, then I wonder whats more precious to deserve..

    to my favs.. U have no idea how much impressed i am..

    AND touched

  • 8 years ago

    by Ingrid de Klerck


    I have given this poem a lot of thought, it is very well rounded and one could make a whole story from these few lines, expand on it and maybe even write a short story based on what you have given the reader.

    I love how you ended it, kind of like a fairy tale:) I love good endings!

    Clever write, once again.

    5/5 ingrid

  • 8 years ago

    by Rania Moallem

    Congratulations :)

  • 8 years ago

    by Meena Krish

    Very is like a nursery rhyme
    with very deep and meaninful thoughts put
    together..well written! Congrats on the win :)

  • 8 years ago

    by Dark Secrets

    Wow! that's very creative... you managed to use numbers in a wonderful way to count the days of your life and it doesn't sound at all like a nursury rhyme... couldn't have done it any better!

  • I have no idea what to even say about this poem - all I know is that I love it.

    It's really cleverly written by the use of then clock to count - it sounds like the story spans a day, but bythe content we know it spans years, a lifetime I think.

    It flowed really smoothly with help from the use of rhyme.

    You have managed to tell one story in depth but than also many shorter, more vague, stories.

    You really have managed to make a masterpiece.