This is a very well written free flowing passionate love poem I would love to hear recited in a coffee shop... I love it

"Everything about you
has shattered the mold you
were conceived in. "

loved the above!

As for the poem as a whole I enjoyed the read a lot but wasn't so fussed on this part

"I'm pouring
buckets of blood mixed with
a sick uprising of tangled
passion."

I feel this poem was a real mix of emotions and it goes to show how love is a complicated issue.

5/5

Hey Nik. Long time no read. =]

Really nice poem. You remind me of someone who used to write on here a long time ago. She was my favorite poet of all time on this site.

me like sharp craving utensils, leaving
-- I think you meant "carving." :]

You ran into me like a bullet
fleeing it's chamber.
-- OoOoOoh. I love this line. Similes are my favorite.

I once asked for normalcy--
but you're a disease that I
have to keep feeding. I don't
love you no more than I hate you.
I'm dysfunctional for you. Spinning
into a frenzy with my hands tied
behind my soul hoping, wishing
you'd come back and knock me
off my axis.
-- I didn't want to separate this into sections to critize it, because it's so beautiful all together. This is definitely my favorite part of the poem.

Someone once spoke of love...
I speak of something deeper.
-- I love the first line, but the last line left me a little disappointed. It was like a huge build up, and then something so simple. I think it was gunna be deeper, like something to make you think a little harder. At least that's what I expected for a last line.

Overall - Amazing poem! You're very talented at picking the right words.

NIk
You did a great job on this piece! I was drawn into your words right away. Wonderful imagery and word choices.

Someone once spoke of love
as if it were a fairy tale not
an emotion. Boy meets girl and
the world is their's for the taking.
Beautiful--
So you would think, accept beauty is
the cover for all of our
dark misshapen lies.

This kind of Fairy Tale love is very rare. Only a few ever really have this kind of love. If you find it hold on to it.

I once asked for normalcy--
but you're a disease that I
have to keep feeding. I don't
love you no more than I hate you.
I'm dysfunctional for you. Spinning
into a frenzy with my hands tied
behind my soul hoping, wishing
you'd come back and knock me
off my axis.

To me what I'm getting from this piece is more of a obssesive love. Where the writer cannot do with out this person. Like they have taken over her soul.
Excellent job!
Love Cindy

I loved the second stanza and thought it was written to perfection. It's so true that a lot of people want to be in love so bad that they'll lie to themselves and pretend. Pretend they're happy and satisfied and that everything will work out, but they're fooling themselves and there hearts!

The last stanza was a pretty strong ending to a well written piece. The part I enjoyed best was "Spinning into a frenzy with my hands tied behind my soul hoping" I just loved the fact that it means you have no control over this love you feel anymore and although you know you need to get away from it, you can't do it. I might even toss a comma before the word hoping just to give it that little suspenseful pause.

Great work as always 5/5

"So you would think, accept beauty is"

Unless I'm reading this wrong (and I could lol) I think "accept" should be "except", right? :)

"there is no such thing as
tomorrow, there is only
you."

This is pure beauty. Absolutely gorgeous lines here, I only wish I'd thought of them myself lol. Very inspirational!

"I don't
love you no more than I hate you."

I think this should be 'I love you no more than I hate you'. OR "I don't love you more than I hate you". The double negative threw me off a little.

I love the repetition in the beginning and the end.. "Someone once spoke of love". I thought it was interesting and wrapped everything together very well. You had a lot of strong images and one thing I can definitely say about this piece is that it is full of absolute raw emotion, and in my opinion that is the best kind of poetry we can have.

That ending hit home for me, and I think it was the PERFECT ending to this poem. So often people think love is as far as it goes, but to those truly in love, head of heels, soul mate kind of love, it feels much more, it's deeper and something you just can't pinpoint or put your finger on. This truly was a beautiful poem! Well done!

I can't pick a favorite part because the whole
poem just sucked me into its world leaving
me breathless..this was simply brilliantly written well!! Loved it girl...keep penning!!

I STOOD SPELLBOUND DEAR..PLZ READ MY POEMS

I STOOD SPELLBOUND DEAR..PLZ READ MY POEMS

I think you should write a book titled: "Dummies guide for portraying a mix of emotions"

This is one amazing poem ... I felt love, hate, rage, desire, submission .....

You are sure speaking of something way deeper :D

Way to go