Comments : Iced Tea

  • 5 years ago

    by Steven Beesley

    Life is never fair, we lose the ones we cherish and love and for what?

    Your words go straight to the heart and leave a lump in the throat after reading. Good write.

  • 5 years ago

    by chewang

    Very touching, you are a talent !!

  • 5 years ago

    by Yakori bint Muhammed

    This is written beautifully by personifying iced tea. I was sad while reading this. Its so emotive of your soulful feelings. So gripping, one can feel your anxiety and scares. Such trying and capricious moments can be so hard on one. A heart wrenching piece, even with the unhappy message it carries. Its written so superbly. Great work!

  • 4 years ago

    by Sinclaire

    This is not going to be elegant,
    nor polished, as sliver spoons.

    ^I like how straight forward this is as well as the comparison you use here. It sets the tone from the beginning.

    I could write about your silly grin,
    or the way you giggle at my jokes,

    ^ without this stanza, I feel like the poem would be incomplete. It's so simple but shows so much emotion in it.

    but tonight I feel the need to express
    something far more deeper than darkness.

    ^ This term "deeper than darkness" really got me, it's brilliant because its hard to comprehend, like your circumstance.

    You saved me that day on the hill,
    when black crows flocked upon our feet,
    the day you said that you understood me.

    ^ I love the imagery here. It's also deep, that moment when someone understands you is one of those moments you never forget. At least that's how it is for me, if someone truely gets me, than I know they will become an important part of my life or at least be written in my heart.

    I poured out my past like a glass of iced tea,
    you drank every last word I shared,
    accepting me for me, no judgement,

    ^ Wow. This is my favorite stanza, the discription you use here is brilliant.

    you sat there with this intense look in your eyes,
    held my hand under an afternoon sun and said
    "a lost soul deserves to be loved, just love me
    as I so love you...."

    ^ touching, the care that thy have shown. And that you have had this powerful moment with someone or acceptance and pure love.

    So love please tell me, how am I supposed to swallow
    the fact that your cancer has ignited like fire once again,
    and will soon take the one person that truly believes in me?

    ^ my throat dried up as I read this, it breaks my heart. Cancer is one of the hardest things to deal with, it's so unexpected and can drag on for so long looking up but then have everything end so suddenly. My heart goes out to you.

    No this is not elegant, and I'd rather be polishing spoons
    then to have that glass of iced tea sit empty at our table....

    ^ I love the ending and how you tied the iced tea back in, it's such a bittersweet end.

    As for the title, I love it! I definitely wasn't expecting the poem to turn out the way it is, but it makes so much sense. Iced Tea is bittersweet as is this poem.

    I can't 100% explain what's going through my mind and my thoughts about this poem, but it's heart wrenching and beautiful. You are a very talented poet, I hope to get to know you better through your poetry as well as learn from you. Everything I've read so far has so much soul put into it and that is a rare quality.

  • 4 years ago

    by kitten

    Very potent.you can feel the sorrow and loss looming and yet the love for them is so overwhelming, you can feel it in every word. It started a little rough but soon built up a great rhythm as to be expected with this topic. Its so descriptive and strong, I was truly taken aback by these words.

    Stunning write. 4.5

    With love,
    Lovenut

  • 4 years ago

    by Love Fallacy

    A truely deep piece. I could only imagine how hard it must be to go through something like that. Great job on the poem.

    I was hoping you would be able to check out some of my newer pieces and let me know what you think. I would love to get one nominated for the poetry contests.

    thank you

  • 3 years ago

    by Midnight Sky

    Aww started good but ended so sad but i can relate to it 5\5

  • 3 years ago

    by Poet on the Piano

    I'm not really sure what led me to read this today, since it's an older poem and I don't usually go back often with others' work. Maybe it's the fact I recently had iced tea, and this was on your featured list and I remembered reading it years ago. But it's one of my favorites (though while looking through the comments I realized I never left one, sorry about that, don't know why I never did!).

    It speaks to me so deeply and your voice is so strong here. That first line of admitting it won't be elegant, that reminds me of all the times we do things or say things that aren't "poetic", but we don't worry about that because we need to have our heart understood. The depth and I also think strength to write this poem since it is personal to you, that is a genuine beauty. Sometimes there are things deeper than darkness, things we know will come, but I am glad you have found your true love. I believe the power of love, and the way you write about him, will last forever and is something that will always be cherished. Even when time tells us we're limited. The way you accept each other, love each other, talk about each other, open up to each other is inspiring. I hope that everyone can have a soul-mate like that at some point in their life. I know I can't possibly understand but it humbles me you can share this poem with us, your story and your true emotions. My heart goes out to you always...

  • 3 years ago

    by Maple Tree

    Ohhhh MaryAnne, I love how you get me... and I adore this comment and you! Before I met Jim I had given up hope of having a soulmate... I was blessed to have him kiss my world.. Even in sadness of his health, the love we share far outweighs the sadness... when I write of him and out love... there is no editing... to have this poem highlighted means a great deal to me... thank you for stopping by this one... means a great deal to me, its my favorite too <3

  • 2 years ago

    by Tiffany

    I love this poem!! It is so sad but still I love it!! My favorite one!! 5/5

  • 2 years ago

    by Ben Pickard

    What a powerful piece. Really well written.

  • 1 year ago

    by Brenda

    I truly love this poem! Such love, such sadness. Since I'm fairly new to this site I'm playing catch up on everyone's poems-I hope your true love is still very much a part of your life. I can tell he means the world to you.

  • 5 months ago

    by Sai

    This cuts deep.

    One of the best metaphors I've read in a while too. Sometimes our worst experiences can bring out the most beautiful poetry.

  • 5 months ago

    by Milly Hayward

    Stunning and wonderfully written. Well deserved win congratulations x