Wow thats amazing!! u really do have talent! keep it up and just wow u r really good!
god bless you
xoxoxo justwant2smile

Wow.. this is such a great poem!! i love it so much.. its really good

I liked it, but I think that there are some things that should be changed. I like the rytheme of the poem, but I think that you could capitalize the beginings of new sentence and there are a few places where you forgot the letter s. 5/5

~Alyson

I reall liked this poem. You definitley need to keep it up. But I do agree with the person who left the firstt comment. Even though capitalizing each sentence wouldn't make the poem better,it's fine the way it is, but would make it look better.

marcella

I like this one too but it seems like every other stanza is written in a different form.. or maybe its just me?

Wow, i like the way you write. [i just read a couple of ur poems]... u use such few words in each stanza, but u get ur point across and keep a nice rythm. very cool. thanks for the comment =]
-hannah

I really liked the sortness of each line... it was a really good style.

loved the poem, really good imagry.

shadow dancer

Wow. hmm. what to fix???

idk. i liked it a lot. your wording is very powerful, and ur rhythm flows nicely.

Good choice on rhyming words. it fit the poem together well. but i could not get into this poem like i could your other ones. so i cant really say anything about it.

Wow! I loved the imagery in this one! The stanza's are short but worked out very well! This poem is simply, flawless ;)
Great job, once again!
5/5

I'm not sure that i know what this poem is about, but i love the imagery! this is a good write! keep it up

Narc xxx

Ahh super sad.
it's like.. suffocating-ish.
i dunno.
good job.

-Parker

I love the imagery. It's excellent. I kind of found this poem to be somewhat too fragmented, also. If you were to change it into couplets it would read better.

Good job.

Wonderful.
The imagery stuck out the most, as I was picturing the whole poem in my mind. =] Rhyming structure was good and there were no parts I had to re-read and your vocabulary on this one was good. Wonderful job overall hun! Keep it up! 5/5

Stephanie.

I enjoyed this poem. however, it wasn't my favorite of yours. there were a few parts that kind of messed up the flow, but overall the format was splendid. wonderful work once again. 5/5

My favourite of your's so far.
I thought everything about this was perfect.
You did a wonderful job on this.

Wow, that was so powerful hun. the flow was smooth, it was brilliant.
much love and many kisses,
bex

Wow. I absolutely loved this poem. It was amazing. The feelings that are portrayed are almost perfect. The flow was great, along with the rhyming and such.

In the third and fourth stanza, I believe you had the word "She" and it should have been she's, and then in the fourth you it could either be "burns OR winds" instead of burn and wind.

Overall you did an outstanding job, another great descriptive poem.

Keep it up, hun.
<3 Teria.