What a lovely poem this is. A seamless collaboration that has a dreamy and soft feel to it that's almost calming to read.
Lovely, unforced rhyme that obvious effort has been put into - lots of two/three syllable rhyming words that give the poem a fresh feel.
Excellent - I really enjoyed this.
All the very best,
"I seize shelter in your whisper
Tranquility in your stunning smile
With your persuasion, I defer
Each moment spent; worthwhile"
^This is actually the first collaboration I've read here, and I must confirm, it is quite excellent :).
You've explored love in immense detail and the usage of strong adjectives and addictive rhyme has formulated a doubtlessly unique piece. Brilliant use of imagery throughout the piece.
I would comment further but my head is dead. Nonetheless, good stuff, mate :).