^They don't rhyme. It throws the flow off.
Only flaw I found. Well done. The poem really imaged out the war in Iraq and let people know it's no joke out there. Well done with the discription. Keep up teh writing!
<3Tay God bless 5/5
Hm..I like it. the first part sounds like it would be good for holloween. lol. but the way you finished it was awesome. and it would really be cool if the world was like that (at peace). you know? awesome poem. 5/5 and thanx for commenting on my work.