Comments : Mother is what your not

  • 10 years ago

    by Hermosa

    Its so dificult to express things like this but you did such a good job writing it and you put so much feeling into it good job you have great talent

  • 10 years ago

    by judith redmount

    Committing suicide is not the solution. But this poem reads well, nice rhyme.

  • 10 years ago

    by Spirit

    What little did i know
    what you were "prob ally" high

    One word.
    you did this twice and i didn't know if it was part of the poem but it should be fixed.
    5/5
    fix your spelling
    great job
    hard subject

  • 10 years ago

    by Melpomene

    I liked the emotions portrayed into this poem it was quite sad. The only things I suggest is your grammer errors, Capitalize your "I's" and so on just minor errors though they make the poem look untidy. The meaning behind this was capturing I did enjoy reading this. Overall a pretty good read. Keep writing. ~mel

  • 10 years ago

    by Cella Bella

    This is really powerful and full of emotion. A few suggestions...
    -capitalize your I's
    -add some punctuation where needed
    ex. "id" should be I'd
    -probably is one word

    Nonetheless, this is a geat write. It's very heartfelt and I think you did a great job.

    marcella

  • 10 years ago

    by Stephanie

    Wow.
    A very touching & heartfelt write. The emotions portrayed were heartbreaking. The flow was flawless && overall, just did a good job. 5.5 :]] Keep writing.

    -- Stephanie <3

  • 10 years ago

    by Marc Ortiz

    It was a very good poem, I think it flowed nicely. You have some minor errors though..

    First.. Capitalize all the I's :)
    and..
    it (prob ally) would have been different
    = Probably

    Overall it was a nice poem.

  • 10 years ago

    by Curry

    Awhh this is really sad and im sorry if this happened to you. i rated it a 4/5 though. at times it went off flow. but you still did a good job. i think capitalizing the beginning or each sentence and using commas and periods would make it easier to read. and im not sure if you noticed but probably is spelled **probably** just so you know :] good job though :]

  • 10 years ago

    by xxxStarSxxx

    Aww! So much emotion! The flowing was really well done. 5/5 sweetie and keep it up!
    <3 Stef

  • 10 years ago

    by amoxi

    Wow this poem was amazing, it had so much emotion and rage it was beautiful wonderful job

  • 10 years ago

    by nikki

    Wow. it was a very sad poem, i loved the way you expressed it, it was like i were in your shoes as i was reading this, i could see how terrified and angry you felt, nice work. 5/5 for this one.
    and it was very well expressed

  • 10 years ago

    by Roxy

    =( Such a sad poem, I hate it when children are being put down by their parents it makes me so upset about the world we live in today.Keep it up xxxxx Love Roxy

  • 10 years ago

    by Nowhere Man

    Great poem... i enjoyed reading it...

  • 9 years ago

    by Courageous Dreamer

    Ahh. This was very hard to read.. I hope you won't abused liek this when you were little... by your mother.. that would be terrible. this poem all in all was really good.. you expresssed your emotions very well yet again.. however.. you had some spelling mistakes.. i realize you spelt probably wrong a few times.. so maybe you'd wanna check that out. overall, great job 5/5

  • 9 years ago

    by she

    This is so sad,
    i wish it could have been different for you :[

    but you wrote this wonderfuly, i really felt the emotion.
    5/5

  • 9 years ago

    by Lonely Rider

    Hey this is so sad and touching...

    "I cry myself to sleep at night
    Wondering, what if id died
    So i sit here in my corner
    Ready to give my life to suicide "

    ^^ very emotional...

    one suggestion.. make all the i's capital
    also,
    "so i ran and i hid"
    so I ran and hid... sounds much better... but thats just a suggestion..

    overall a nice write... keep writing..

  • 9 years ago

    by RobinAnn13

    This poem is so sad.
    Very emotional
    I think the flow of the poem is a little stressed at times but otherwise it's an awesome poem. You had very good word choice and I think a lot of people could relate to it.
    5/5
    <3<3