The first part was a bit off but as I got reading I was like WOW! it was just absolutly amazing and you did an excellent job!

Girl, this was amazing i loved it.The flow was great and it kept me wondering throughout the whole thing. A beautifully penned poem. Much deserving of a 5 ~mel

The first part was a little off and in my opinion there were a couple of lines that kinda didnt flow very well but overall its a great poem, I like it! 5/5

Wow, powerful! I liked the imagery in this one, you explained each movement very well so that I felt like I could see everything that was happening in it. I loved this poem. Keep up the great writing.

5/5 (:

I grab my head in duress,
And fall unto my knees.
Suffocating in the moment,
Done screaming out pleas.
That was my favorite part...once again i could feel agony coming from each line...the poem is very well written and i like the form...great work
Jonda Beth

This poem is amazing.
Your such a good writer.
5/5

~Chelsea

Wow, wonderful poem. I liked the imagery.

'As the pain slowly crowds.
I grab my head in duress,
And fall unto my knees.
Suffocating in the moment,
Done screaming out pleas.'

Those are my favourite lines.

Keep it up 5/5

Astonishing poem, excellently written and it kept me going, amazing flow and imagery, everything just fit !

5/5

Im really feeling this. its longevity is nice, and vocabulary was aswsome. duress is one of my favorite words. thanks for reading my stuff, i havent posted any more becouse i havent captured very many readers, and the ones that do
lecture on poetic rhetoric... and how to write my poems. i dont know if ill post anymore stuff.. but ill send you some if youd like.

5/-Tom.

I felt the emotion in this poem! amazing! 5/5!

I love this two stanza

Help me please,
Free me from myself.
Help me escape,
Get me out of hell.

I look up at that girl again,
Only to see a tomb.
I turn in fear,
Only to feel it more soon...

TC :)

You sure put the final nail in that poetic coffin. great job, and keep doing such a great job.

your servant:
david