Comments : The Loneliness

  • 16 years ago

    by Kitten

    Oh so sad i can really relate i hope your okay

  • 16 years ago

    by Michael D Nalley

    I love the colloquial charm of this poem, it adds to the originality
    Passion is universal and loneliness is easily understood by any culture. I really did enjoy reading this

  • The emotion was shown and it flowed well.
    I think you could of added more to the poem.
    Keep it up 4/5

  • 16 years ago

    by noha

    Nice work , keep it up

  • 16 years ago

    by FlawlesslyTarnished

    Very beautiful! I can relate to this soo much. Cuz I'm in the same predicament, and have been for the past year. It hurts, but as time passes, you just have to let go, slowly. Little by little, day by day. :] 5/5.

  • 15 years ago

    by Marjan

    Loneliness hurts bad, especially after being with someone you still love. Hell is not that bad, unless you've been to heaven first. That's a fact.
    How long have you been writing? This was good, even though it could be even better.

  • 15 years ago

    by Poet on the Piano

    Nicely done, I enjoyed reading this poem. You expressed your emotions well and I think a lot of people can relate. Good work, and thanks for the comment! :)

  • 15 years ago

    by Lizaveta

    The first part really made nme go "awww". it describes loneliness so well. i think i can relate to this. this form of kinda appeal (repeating "tell me...", questions "why") is so great! the line about promise is so emotional and strong!!
    but the ending kinda annoys me.

    But if u would just know that these tears

    (you can't use "will" or "would" after "if". it should be but if you know that these tears)
    Telling how much i missing you

    (i guess "tell" would be better.... othercase, "are telling". )

    And wanting to be with you once again...

    The same thing: i miss <...>and want. You can't use "want" in continious i guess. I think "once" in the last line is useless)

    i know it's not the main thing, but it would be just more accurate and gramatically clear this way:

    But if u just know that these tears
    Are telling how much i miss you
    And want to be with you again...

    overall, i really enjoyed reading this poem. 4/5

  • 15 years ago

    by Karl Wild GG23

    Once again I think most people if not all can relate to the emotions in your poetry. I have somebody in my life who I love with all my heart and when were not together I'm thinking about. The sun rises and sets with her and when I close my eyes I see her face. It's much worse to see somebody in your mind that you miss when you know you might now see them again :( Excellent job once again 5/5 GG23

  • 15 years ago

    by ALEX

    The rhyming was off a lot. I would re-work it. Other than that, it's an okay poem.