I cant be her, Dad

I don’t want to say goodbye,
I don’t need your smile or your sigh.
Just leave me alone,
A long way from home.
I cant stand to hear you say,
That I will make it some day.
I don’t know what’s wrong with me,
But I don’t care, I try not to see.
You cant tell but I can explain,
All the problems I go through I don’t complain.
I suffered through enough so far,
The times you treat me like crap is a distant scar.
I’m just trying to get my heart in your face,
Could I have been saved if I was smart, cute, a different race?
I don’t know I don’t think I will ever,
The words you say to me are forever.
Once you say them you cant take them back,
You cant say I don’t try everyone gets some slack.
I keep everything a secret, afraid of you,
Afraid of what you might say or do.
I don’t think you understand me,
I don’t think you can clearly see.
I tell my self there is always tomorrow,
No need to have any sorrow.
I just put everything in the back of my head,
And forget that the stains in my heart that are blood red.
I try not to see what you want me to,
I tend to drift off and ignore you.
I see myself failing you and your dreams of who I could be,
I don’t think you understand or maybe I just don’t agree.
I cant explain to you what this all feels like,
Because I know your reaction will bring on a fight.
A never ending fight of pain,
The pain that would drive me insane.
I don’t understand why I’m set apart from her,
The goal you want me to reach is just a blur.
I don’t think I can ever compare,
I don’t think I can ever be that un-fair.
I just know that I am me,
And being me is my biggest plea.
My words don’t mean anything to what you know,
I keep digging up but I just end up below.
Not getting any higher but getting much much lower.
Maybe my life is just going to fast and I should take it slower.
I have been alone all these years,
Having no help and coming face to face with all my fears.
Its so hard to look at you and hold back what I have to say,
But when I do that all my fears seem to go away.
Everything is so wrong to you,
I seriously don’t know what to do.
I just want to be your prefect child,
But I guess that dream is to far to follow, maybe to wild.
I just don’t know how to say that I need you,
Because you’re my biggest fear and I’m truly sorry I mean it…I really do.

I wrote this poem because my dad sees my sister at such a higher quality and she isn't....please coment