You have a gift thats far beyond mine u can write without ryming 5/5

Hahahaha wow! its like you took my head by your hands and turned my entire outlook of life into another way, loved the poem. loved all of it.. i have to say it was remarkable and penned so beautifully

This has definitely got that summarized powerful msg.... this is a good idea.. why make it short?! i wish u could've made it longer.. i think it'll be much much better! good job tho =]

Ok this poem was rather short lol but like the saying goes...dnomite somes in small packages...i loved it...and the first two lines really grabbed me
verry nice!

Wow... the whole piece is simply amazing... such powerful and meaningful words used...
the last three lines are simply beautiful...
your take on the subject is really praiseworthy...

Loved it..

First off, I fancy the heck out of your title! Brilliant! Very witty with a little hint of charm.

Now the piece ... short, great diction -- I keep reading it over and over and still get a fuzzy interpretation of what I think it means in my eyes.

Serenity is sold
in small plastic bottles.
` Poise and peace ... Teenagers never feeling at peace with themselves until they look good or feel good. Or until everybody else thinks they're "cool." Calm and acceptance sold in make-up and perfume -- and plastic bottles ... makes me think drugs. Plastic also makes me think materialistic. Simple words and short lines that can say so much about the big picture of society now-a-days.

Emotion is observed,
rationalized, diagnosed.
` Everyone's always judging everyone. Staring, whispering, gossiping -- small things are turned into dramatic plots that could be turned into storylines, and then the people are labeled. "Disagnosed" with who they are or who people think they should be.

Life is manufactured,
artifical perfection,
` Today's "perfection" is so superficial, it's sickening. "Manufactured" brings the image of machinery ... bogus definition of what beauty is and how everyone should be, what we should do and how we all should look or talk.

batteries not included.
`Hm, now that's a tough one. In my translations, it signifies that we're sent into this world -- of highschool and of drama and of rules even throughout adult life and such (or so from what I've heard, read and seen, so forgive me if I'm wrong) -- but we're shoved into this vicious world without "batteries," an energy or something to help us through. We must find our own "batteries" -- which I think, are our friends that we meet in life. We're not born with them -- we have to work for them, receive them on our own.

Just my thoughts. And just so you know, I wouldn't change a thing about this piece. It's simply stunning.
Definitely a complicated favourite of mine now.
..__MiNDYY

The title of this piece caught my attention and made me read this and I wasn't disappointed at all.

First off, the fact that you expressed so much within such short piece impressed me. I love this poem from the first to the last line. The topic that you wrote about is great and meaningful and you managed to express your thoughts on excellent, very profound way. I like your choice of words along with fantastic imagery that the whole poem holds. Also, I couldn't agree more with the message of this poem which made the piece even more powerful for me.

Excellently done,
5/5 from me.

Very powerful, Its short and Simple and you got right to the meaning..Good job

It took me a few re-readings of this poem to finally get at what you were trying to get across but that's just me. I'm slow so don't be offended. Anywho, such a short poem with such basic, common words yet it was indescribable. A well deserved 5/5!
~Stefanie

I like it! Could have been a little longer but still really good!! 5/5

This free verse has a great flow delivering a very deep truth

I like this one too...man your a hecka good writter

Different.. but in a good way. it short and sorta spunky in it's own way. i like it. keep it up. ~KM~