The Way Things Used To Be

The way things used to be
how they were at the start.
It's all so much different now
it almost breaks my heart.
There's less brightness
given to me each day
in your heart, your soul
or in any special way.

Almost everything has changed
and I'm not sure why I'm here
to watch you disintegrate
and inside, tremble with fear.
I'm afraid of what has happened
though you try and deny
that anything has changed at all
But I've figured out you lie.

There's too much between us
I feel like such a bore.
Why is it that you treat me
like I am your chore?
I want to experience the love
you gave to me, all over again.
I want to feel the touch
that I felt back then.

My heart cries out
for the brightness of your smile
for the days we'd just sit and talk
and make "us" worthwhile.

There aren't any more compliments
I wonder if I'm going insane,
but the way that you've changed
is causing me so much pain.
You're not the man I fell in love with,
your a teen in love with your life.
I'm no longer a beautiful girl,
that you want to make your wife.
Friends are important too,
but I've always put you as number one
I want you to know I'm here for you
but I don't know when I'll be done.

I feel like I can't even talk
to the guy that I adore
and even when I do
I always yearn to say more.
Do you really pay attention
to my words that I cry?
Because sometimes I feel like
I want to crumple up and die.
My world revolves around you
but I don't think you get it
you just keep spiraling downward
and my heart is dimly lit.

Now I know things change
but now I'm more like your friend.
I just want you to show your love for me
and see us through to the end.
This poem isn't an insult
and the furthest from a strike
I'm not saying I want to leave,
or for you to take a hike.

It's simply a warning,
of where our relationship may go
if things keep changing as they are
and no love starts to show.

I love you so much Layton,
you just completely make me, me.
You know I'm greatful for you..
but I prefer things
The Way They Used To Be.

** This is dedicated to my boyfriend, Layton. I just don't know what to do. We're going long-distance right now, and his friend is living with him. He no longer has time for me, and I just don't feel the same sort of love anymore. I'm more like his friend that he just calls when he feels like it. I feel like I can't do any better than him though, because sometimes he does treat me great. I mean, I don't think I can get a boyfriend where I live because no one likes me for me like he does. I'm so confused, I have it all bottled up inside because whenever I confront him about it he totally gets angry and thinks I have no point. Nevertheless, he always tells me I can talk to him about anything. My gosh, this is way too much personal information and it's not even close to all of it! Anyhow, if you have any advice or comments, go ahead and speak your mind.