My Journey

There once was a boy
so kind and gentle and sweet
he opened me to all new things
but sadly this tale had an end to meet

He said he loved me
and would never let go
but its amazing how fast
never tends to show

With him gone i collapsed
into a crumpled heap
without him in my life
there was nothing left for me

I was all but dead
brushing my demons out of sight
I didn't want to live
I couldn't find the light

Every day and every night
my reason for life slipped away
cause i realized in my heart
all he ever wanted was a lay

It was over in my eyes
there was nothing left for me
I had no friends, no close relatives
no one to ease my misery

But then another came into my life
a bright and glowing star
he showed me how to love again
he mended this broken heart

He loved and comforted me
when no one else even cared
he was always there for me to lean on
and with him all secrets were shared

And everyday he kept me sane
he kept me from the edge
and as the days went on and on
i realized i stood on a different ledge

He had always been there for me
but this was something new
experiencing life through blissful eyes
I realized i had fallen in love with you

you were my best friend
and not someone i wanted to lose
but when you saw the look in my eyes
you quickly glanced at your shoes

you started talking quietly
almost a whisper to my ears
you told me how you felt
how you had felt for years

apparently through it all
you were always the one for me
although i couldn't see you before
you were always there,
asking god for one chance for us to be

Its too bad that I'm not worthy of you
and that i repulse you in every way
that the only reason you stayed with me
was because you needed a lay

Ive finally decided
to give up this whole notion
of finding the right guy and growing old
because its about as likely as draining the ocean

I'm just not good enough
for anyone to stay
so I'm leaving happiness to everyone else
because i just get played

So as you can see
my life's been a long weary path
I'm doomed to die alone
wallowing in sorrow and wrath