Help me through!

Crying in to the pillow
not a sound to be heard,
screaming in my head
but not saying one word,

each tear that i cry
brings anger and pain,
water dripping down my eyes,
seeing the scars open once again,

I'm ripping apart inside
being torn in two,
i want to run away and hide
no one can help me pull through,

i want to turn to the blade
because i feel so weak,
instead of seeing the scars fade
i want to cut again and deep,

i hate feeing this way
but what am i to do?
i cant stand this pain
please can some one help me through?