Keep Your Enemies at a Far

I would probably start each line with a capital, no matter what word it is. Seems like you tried to make this poem rhyme, but you rhymed words together that don't rhyme....why'd you do that? The one good rhyme doesn't even count because you spelled lose wrong (loose) and it sounded like choose. Together/Another, Example/Angle, Far/Heart... none of those rhyme either. Finding one or two minor mistakes like a puncuation error is nothing compared to spelling mistakes and unmatched rhymes.

Some examples: "

"They say that love is blind,
so this was a prime example.
No matter which way you looked at it,
it was f__ked from every angle."

"They say love is blind,
You're a prime example,
No matter which way I looked,
It was crooked on every angle"

Even though the two don't rhyme haha that sounds much much better. 3/5

This is a poem with a common theme; basically of a relationship not working out. Though sometimes poems with this theme can get so tedious, because they all sound the same. This one was different though. You developed a theme within the theme, of lovers turning to enemies, and kept true to this the whole way through.

- "I guess you could say,
that I was lying to myself.
Thinking we could make it,
as we slowly drowned ourselves."

Wonderful opening stanza. So true, as well. Sometimes when we want something badly enough, to really love a person to the point where we're unable to make ourselves see that it's not working, then we'll convince ourselves that even though it's killing us, it'll work out somehow.

- "They say that love is blind,
so this was a prime example.
No matter which way you looked at it,
it was f__ked from every angle."

I don't think this was meant to be, but that last line was kind of comedic. It made me giggle though feel sorry for the persona at the same time.

Overall, an enjoyable read.

I'm glad you commented on my poem, therefore meaning I had to comment on three of yours. You're a very interesting writer and I've enjoyed reading your work. I'm going to keep checking back to see when you have new work up; I'd love to read it. :)

I really like it and totally agree with the ending. 5/5

Beautiful poem, excellently written, flawless flow, easy to read. Very expressive, full of pain, love, regret and anger. Excellent.

I loved how you turned around the saying "Keep your friend's close, but keep your enemy's closer." It was a new way of thinking, I guess. The flow was really good, no awkward pauses.

If I ever had to pick agan
-- It should be "again" not "agan". Probably just a typo. I hate those. <.<

I've learnt to keep my friends close,
and my enemies at a far.
I believe it's a lot safer,
than an enemy owning my heart...
-- I think this was a really good ending stanza for the poem. It kind brings that "closure" feeling. Like you've learned your lesson and now you're moving on. Great job. :] Loved it.

Keep writing!
Cayce